Past Sins
by BVBhybrid
Summary: Loki's enemies finally catch up to him, they manage to catch Zarina and Thor. The two most important people to him. When Loki arrives he is forced to chose between Thor or Zarina. However once they leave things aren't what they seem. And the king has other plans for his new warrior. (Sorry this is a lame description. I really am not good at them.) Rated M: violence, torture
1. Death

**A/N: This is going to be short perhaps 5-10 chapters.**

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**Character info:**

**Zarina**

**Asgard Warrior**

**Betrothed**** to Loki**

**Age is unknown**

**Long black hair**

**5' 7''**

**Emerald eyes**

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My eyes took a few seconds to adjust to the harsh light in the room. Well cell was more like it. I didn't remember much, only being escorted back to my bedchambers by Thor after the word of the new threats over Asgard. My whole body was numb and my head hurt wickedly. Looking down I thanked all the gods in the Nine Realms that my purple dress was still intact. Dirty, but still on my body. The only reason I was in a dress was because before the news about the threats, I was actually celebrating with all of Asgard. More specifically: Loki.

I was the second most important person to him; the first being Thor.

"Zarina?" I heard a deep voice ask, looking up I saw Thor in chains across from me. We were in the same cell chained to the walls by our wrists and a large collar around our necks and heavy chains.

"Thor?" I asked weakly.

"It's ok Zarina I'm right here. No one is going to hurt you, you have my word." Looking closer I could see a little bit of blood around his wrists, he had obviously been struggling trying to get out.

"Thor you're chained to the wall, I don't think you're getting out any quicker than I am. How did they manage to capture us?"

"I don't know. How badly are you hurt?" I looked up at him, I could tell he was badly hurt and weak, but he wouldn't show it.

"I don't know, I can't really feel anything. Everything is numb and my head hurts, gods does my head hurt. How about you?"

"I'm fine."

"Cut the crap, Thor I can tell you're hurt. What. Is. Wrong."

"Mostly the same, but my wrists hurt instead of my head. What do you remember before waking up here?" Finally he told me what was wrong, he usually never admitted weakness.

"Uh, you escorting me to my bedchambers and that's it. You?"

"I recall a small fight and someone muttering something. My guess is that they must have used old, powerful, magic to subdue us. Whoever we are dealing with is old and powerful. Or extremely wealthy, magic like that can be bought for a high price."

"Right." We both looked up at each other than at the door to our right when we heard a loud bang. I immediately started to pull and yank at the chains that bound me to the wall. I was fighting against the chains so hard that I probably looked like a desperate wild animal whose final destination was for the slaughter house.

"Zarina, calm down and conserve your strength."

"No! I'm not going down without a fight." I was a warrior not a prisoner and I would not be treated like one.

"Than conserve your strength for that fight." I stopped struggling; he was right I needed to save my strength for the real fight.

Multiple guards walked in, they were in black shiny armor, the armor had many spikes around the shoulders and arms. They also covered faces and pointed horns protruding from their helmets. They had swords sheath to their waists and a couple knives.

A few walked up to me and undid the chains by the ends on the walls. I tried to go for one, but they kept the chains tight so struggling was pointless. They put a blindfold over my eyes and started to walk, well mostly push, me somewhere. We walked for a rather long time, going down long hallways, making many turns, and going up and down flights of stairs. Finally we stopped walking, I was forced to my knees and the blindfold removed.

I looked up and saw Loki, some of the guards had there long staffs in front of him to keep him back. Next to me Thor was also on his knees, and it didn't look willingly. It looked as though he had some more injuries on him from them forcing him to his knees. Looking back at Loki I could see a desperate, pleading, look in his eyes. His face was twisted with anguish and I could tell he was trying to hold back tears.

We were in a large room, don't get me wrong, it was a rather nice room. Golden-looking walls, touches lining the walls a couple feet apart from each other. Nice red carpeting going up to a throne, the throne itself was big, gold, and had a little red pillow on it. The floor that wasn't covered by the carpet was a black marble with small white speaks.

"Well, well, well. Look what the cat dragged in. Loki how nice it is to see you." Some other voice said. Coming out of the shadows was a tall man dressed in fine robes and armor. He wasn't dressed like the guards here, he was dressed like a king. The guards took away their staffs and Loki walked near the king-looking man.

"What do you want?" He asked bitterly.

"Revenge for what happened on Midgard and the lost of my people!"

"And how exactly do you want that revenge? We can give you anything just as long as you let both of my friends go."

"No. Only one of your so-called friends can live and you have to decide who. I'll give you a moment to decide." It was like a thousand knives pierced my heart. Only one of us could live and that had to be Thor no matter what. I was just a warrior, easily replaceable. Thor on the other hand was the frigging God of Thunder, he possesses great power and potential. I immediately started to hide my fear and choke back tears. Loki looked over at us, I couldn't even make eye contact with him. I looked over at Thor, he was looking over at me but wasn't able to make eye contact.

Apparently _everyone_ knew the answer.

"No! Let them go, we have hundreds of prisoners in Asgard. Take them all if you wish!"

"We do not want your leftover prisoners. We want you to pick one of them to die, if not I will chose who gets to live and who gets to die."

"No, I will be walking out with both of them. Or, hell, even take _me_!"

"Loki…" I said and finally made eye contact with him, I was starting to become ok with dying. If Thor was able to live, than that's all that mattered.

"Zarina quiet." he barked. His eyes were filled with tears and a couple had fallen.

"Tick-tock, I don't have all day. You better pick one, now and say goodbye to them. I'll give you that." the King said. Looking over he was preparing a long knife by dipping it in a liquid. It must have been a poison of some kind, hopefully one that would make my death go by quickly and painlessly.

Loki ran up to me and dropped to his knees. "Loki, it's going to be ok. Trust me, shh. It's ok, everything is going to be ok." I told him. He grabbed my face and kissed me passionately. Then he was torn from me and forced to move away from me.

"It was nice fighting alongside you, Zarina" Thor whispered.

"Nice fighting alongside you too, Thor." He was removed from my side and forced to stand away from me. The King started to walk over to me. It was quite obvious who was going to be walking out of here.

I looked back up at Loki, with tears in his eyes he yelled: "I'm so sorry!"

"Thor lives." That was the last thing I heard as the King thrust his knife into my chest.


	2. Loyal to a New King

I woke in the same cell I was in before. I felt confused and dazed; none of the pieces made since. I sat up and looked around, everything was the same from when I left this place the first time. I looked down at my chest, I remembered something going though my chest. My purple dress was covered in blood and torn.

_What happened? How the hell did I get here?_

Than Loki's name came to mind. Instead of love, I felt anger toward him. I felt really angry and like I needed to get revenge. But for what exactly?

I jumped when I heard the doors open and saw the King from before walking toward me. He was also with a few guards. "Hello darling. Zarina, is it?" He grabbed me by my dress and forced me to my feet. "I'm Taegen, the king of this realm."

Getting a closer look at him; he was tall and slightly muscular. He had long blond hair, pointed ears like an elf, but not as long. He had emerald eyes like me and fair skin. I couldn't tell how old he was, but he didn't seem that much older than me. I almost couldn't help but feel attracted to him. Almost.

I spat at him, "Go to hell!" He wiped the spit with the tip of his finger and wiped it on his clothing.

"Oh come now, surely you wish to know how you survived. You must remember being stabbed in the chest."

I growled, he was right. I did remember being stabbed, I must have died. I'm sure of it. "Fine, I'm rather… interested."

"I noticed you watching me with I was dipping the dagger in the potion. It was a very powerful, and expensive, potion to make your heart stop beating for four hours. Before the four hours were up, I gave you a second part of the first. That made you come back and loyal to me."

"That's impossible! I don't feel a shred of loyalty to you." I snarled and clenched my fists.

"Oh, that's right, I forgot something." He motioned to the guards and they grabbed my arms. One held my right arm behind my back and the other held my right arm out in front of me with my palm up. Taegen pulled out a dagger and made a cut on his left palm; he then did the same to me. He laced with fingers with mine over the cuts and started to mutter something. I felt a stabbing pain from my arm to my head, it felt like my brain was going to explode. I tried to fall to the floor, but the guards held me upright.

"Now I need you to repeat after me: I, Zarina ex-warrior of Asgard, solemnly swear my sword, my allegiance, and life, to King Taegen sole ruler of Vanaheim. To live and die under his rule, and if I betray my king, than so shall I be punished with accordance to my crime. I shall live and die by this oath. I shall wear no crowns and win no glory. I am the sword in the darkness. I am the shield that guards the realms of men and women. I pledge my life and honor to Vanaheim."

I tried not to, I kept my jaw clench closed and refused to open it. The pain that ran through my body was unbearable. The longer I refused, the worse it got, it was making me go mad. Taegen dropped my hand and the guards let go of me, I fell to the ground and curled into a ball. I looked up and saw him and the guards leaving.

"I thought you needed my blood to make me loyal to you!" I screamed, I was in so much pain that it was almost hard. I weakly used my arms to prop myself up so I could look at Taegen.

"Actually I don't, its not required for the oath. It is, however, for those words I said. Remember that? I was speaking old Vanaheim, creating a blood bond with you, but the longer you wait to take the oath, the more pain you will be in. However, once you say the oath, you will be loyal to me. Do you already feel an undying hatred for Loki… that "Asgardian"? That's from part one of the potion." He leaned against the door and crossed his arms.

"Yes," I said. "But I _love_ him! How can I hate him so?"

"That is why, it reverses any strong emotion for someone. Love into hate, envy into friendliness, lust into hate… you get the point. I hope you didn't hate anyone before hand... or that would turn into... _lust._ Even if you didn't admit that you hated them. Funny how emotions work, don't you think."

"Trust me, I didn't hate anyon-" I fell to the floor in pain, wrapping my arms around myself I screamed. Once the pain went away, or at least lessened, I was able to speak. "I didn't hate anyone before hand."

"Well see about that. Now I will have a maid bring you a set of armor, your new sword won't stay in here with you obviously. When you're ready to pledge your allegiance to me a guard will bring it with you and you hold it as you say the oath, then I say some stuff." He walked out, but turned around and stood in the threshold. "Until the, darling, see you late. I hope you enjoy the pain. Oh, and, that spell-thing should heal your hand in a few hours." He left and slammed the door.

I turned my face away from the door and curled into a ball. The pain came back and it felt worse than before, I tried to stop my screams, but it was just too much. After awhile the pain went away. Then it came back and went away. Each time it would come back, it was worse than before. Each time it felt like I was being stabbed with a thousand daggers or having a limb ripped off.

After hours of this, I was flat on my back with my arms and legs stretched out, I was staring at the stone ceiling and softly moaning. I couldn't scream anymore, my throat was so raw. But he was right about one thing, the cut on my hand had held. I turned my head to the side when I heard the door open. It was a servant girl with armour and clothing in her hands. She was in a long light blue dress with a white apron over the front part. Her dark hair was pulled back in a white bonnet. She had light brown eyes and fair skin.

"My lady, the King requests you wear this." She kept her eyes on the floor as she laid the armor down and helped me stand up. I was still in pain, but I got up anyway. Mostly because I was afraid of what would happen to this woman if she didn't comply to Taegen's orders.

She undressed me then started to redress me. I got into a pair of dark underwear and dark corset-like top. It wasn't really a corset considering it was extremely flexible, but it covered my entire torso and held my breasts up. She helped me into thick, flexible, leather tights. Then put tight, but again flexible, chainmail over my torso, arms, and went halfway down my thigh. It also went up to my collar bone. I got into a red, thick, leather top, it stopped just inches after my shoulder, wrapped around my neck except the front part, and went down to the tips of the skirt. The skirt part had beautiful stitch work and patterns.

She strapped heavy armor to my chest. The chest piece was two parts, the first part stopped just under my breasts and just at the bottom of my belly. The top part pushed my breasts down and pushed them up. It went around my back and up to the back and sides of my neck. It was flexible to allow me to move my head freely. The whole chest/torso piece had red painting and engravings in it. Next she put on shoulder pieces that went around my shoulder and a little of my upper arm. Next she put the same red leather around my entire forearm and more armor on top of that. It stopped at my wrists and went past my elbow a little. Like the armor around my neck, it allowed me to move it around. Last I stepped into long boots, they were heavy metal and had a heal. They went past my knee, but like with everything else, I had mobility. Around my waist she strapped a leather thing and sword sheath.

"King Taegen would like to know if you're ready to swear oath." I turned around and wrapped my arms around myself. The pain had never gone away as I was being dressed, I was just containing my screams and not showing it for fear I would scare this servant.

I turned around, once my eyes found her face, she looked at the ground again. "Yes."

She finally looked at me. "Excuse me?" Huh, I guess she wasn't expecting that.

"Yes, I am ready. I can't take this anymore."

"Follow me," before walking out, she turned to the pile of clothes and said something. The clothes burst into flames and after a few seconds were nothing but a pile of ash. We then started to walk out of the cell. There were three guards outside waiting, one was holding a nice sword and shield and the others were just standing there. "Go alert the King, tell him she is ready and tell him to lift the spell. She's in a lot of pain." She told the guard who held the sword and shield.

"Right," he said and ran down the hall. It was like I was looking at another person, she wasn't this shy person who walked in to dress me. She was now a strong, smart, woman who held power.

We started to walk down the hall and the two guards followed us. The servant walked a few steps in front of me and the guards a few steps behind me. "Woman, what's your position in this house?"

"Nothing, my lady, I am a simple servant who is respected. His majesty, the King, likes me because I get work done well and efficiently."

"Please, I'm not a lady. I'm a warrior."

"His majesty requests we call you that." Ok that was a new one.

We walked for a rather long time, going down long hallways, making many turns, and going up and down flights of stairs. This all seemed like djvu. As we got higher and away from the dungeons, the place got lighter or rather nicer. White marble walls and floors, torches on metal frames and large windows letting in the outside moonlight.

During this time I had time to think. I was starting to hate Loki and basically all of Asgard, but with Taegen I felt love, loyalty, and… _lust._ I had also realized all the pain was gone, I felt like I had my body back.

I snapped out of my thoughts when we entered the room from before. There were guards on both sides of the red carpet, before that there were court jesters with golden trumpets. As soon as I walked in they started to play, the servant walked away and stood with other servants. I looked behind me, the guards had stood respectfully off to the side too. I took a deep breath and walked down the carpet. Taegen was standing at the top of the stairs that went to his throne, only instead of one there was a second throne. Taegen was holding my shield and sword in his hands.

Once I got up there I dropped to my right knee and bent my head, "My lord." Once I got to my knee the trumpets stopped and everything was silent.

"Zarina, are you ready to become a Vanaheim warrior."

"Yes." I lifted my head to make eye contact with him.

"Hold out your hands, palms up." I obeyed his order. He put the sword into my hands. He put the guard part into my right hand and the blade side into my let. "Then recite the oath"

"I, Zarina ex-warrior of Asgard, solemnly swear my sword, my allegiance, and life, to King Taegen sole ruler of Vanaheim. To live and die under his rule, and if I betray my king, than so shall I be punished with accordance to my crime. I shall live and die by this oath. I shall wear no crowns and win no glory. I am the sword in the darkness. I am the shield that guards the realms of men and women. I pledge my life and honor to Vanaheim." It hit me and flowed into me so suddenly and naturally: my loyalty to my new king.

"Stand up." I stood up and put my head down. "Sheath your sword and lift your head, child." I put my new sword into the sheath and kept my left hand over the grib. I lifted my head up and made eye contact.

"Take this shield and let it be a reminder to your oath to Vanaheim and its people." He walked down to me and held the shield out. I took it and slid my arms though the straps on my left hand.

"Come, Zarina, let Vanaheim gaze upon its new warrior." I walked up with him and stood to this left. Everyone started to cheer and praise me.


	3. Guilt

**Loki's POV**

"Brother come with us for dinner, surely you must be hungry." Thor stood in the doorway and tried to talk to his brother. Loki was sitting on his bed with his knees pulled up to his chest and tears in his eyes. His room was completely destroyed, furniture, clothes, books, and anything else you would find in a bedchamber was on the floor and destroyed. When he got back, he went into a fit of rage and destroyed everything.

One of the few things that wasn't destroyed was a Midgardian book, _"Wicked"_ Zarina enjoyed. She had been reading it because Elphaba reminded her of Loki. She was going to start reading it to him after the celebrations. He always loved the sound of her voice and it seemed to sooth him.

He actually intended to bed her soon. He was already betrothed, so why no? Growing up Zarina was an orphan whom lived under the care of Odin, per Frigga's request, and he always thought they would be the perfect match. Loki figured out from an early age that they were intended to be married. When he discovered this, he was angry because he didn't see her that way and saw her as a sister. But when she got back from training to become a Shield Maiden, he fell head over heals for her.

"No, I am not hungry."

"Also, Father wishes to have a word with you."

"Then tell him I do not wish to have a word with him."

"Mother wishes to have a word with you too." Loki got up and went to the door, before leaving he used his magic to fix everything and put it back in place.

Walking down to the dining hall, most of the Asgardian warriors were there, seated and eating. Odin was at the end of the table with Frigga to his right and two open spots next to her. To Odin's left was one open spot. Loki's spot was next to Frigga and Thor's next to Odin's. Once they entered the dining hall everyone stopped eating and turned to him. As he walked down to his spot everyone stood up and respectfully nodded; if someone was wearing a hat they took it off and placed it on their chest. All the warriors were wearing some sort of red or silver or both. Loki took his spot next to Frigga and just sat there, he felt wrong for sitting there without Zarina next to him. He felt empty.

He stared at the steaming lamb meat, mash potatoes, and vegetables on his golden plate. "Son you must be hungry, please eat." Frigga put her hand on her son's shoulder. Loki picked up his fork and started to push his food around on his plate. Thor, Odin, and Frigga just watched him play with his food. Everyone else at the table glanced around at each other and kept their voices down.

"Like I said to Thor before you, I am not hungry."

"I understand you are upset, but please eat. Zarina wouldn't like to see you like this." Loki glanced down at the empty spot next to him; his mother was right, she wouldn't enjoy seeing him like this. Loki used his fork to scoop up some vegetables and shoved them in his mouth. The food tasted dry and tasteless, nothing tasted like it was meant to. Even the meat tasted bland; and Asgard had one of the finest chefs.

"Sif are ok?" Loki heard Thor ask Sif, who was sitting next to him. Loki looked up, he didn't even realize she was there, he was too caught up in his own grief. Sif was in a casual red and silver dress. It was Asgardian tradition for warriors to wear red or silver to moran the loss of another warrior.

"I am fine," she mumbled.

"Were you and Zarina close?" Loki asked, Sif looked up at him.

"Yes, we were in training together when we were becoming Shield Maidens. We quickly became friends and when we got back we still remained close friends." Loki saw a couple tears escape the corner of her eyes. She quickly wiped them away.

"It's ok to cry, I have." Loki assured. Sif looked up at him and managed a smile.

"Yes, I've seen you two train together. Not only that, but laugh and joke together." Thor said.

"Hey, Konhar, remember when she won that bet and you were forced to wear a dress for a whole day of training?" A short, dark hair and eyed warrior a few seats down said. The warrior known as Konhar had a beet red face. After that the warriors started to tell stories, retell jokes, and retell the stories Zarina made up. The night was filled with laughter and celebration of her life, everyone had something to share.

This should have made Loki sad, but instead he felt happy. He hadn't realized how popular she was and how much everyone loved her. There were stories of bets she made, sometimes winning and sometimes losing. Stories of the jokes and tall tales she made up, fun mishaps on the training field.

Everyone stopped talking when Odin stood up. "Warriors, family, and friends. We lost a great warrior today due to selfish reasons of the Vanaheim. They sought revenge and took her and Thor. When Loki went over to rescue them, he had to chose who lives. Zarina willingly gave her life so that Thor could live; for that I am eternally grateful. Now I assume you all are wondering on whether or not we will be going over to Vanaheim to get revenge for what they did. No, I will not be putting Asgard and its people at risk. It seems that whatever quarrel was going on, is settled. Right now we have to focus on the new threats over Asgard and guard it's people."

Then Thor stood up. "She knew the risks when she swore oath to Asgard and she will get a warriors funeral. It's what Zarina would want, she would want Asgard and its people to be safe."

Then Loki snapped. "And how would _you_ know what she wants? Huh?" Even though what Thor was saying was true, Loki felt angry that he was making assumptions. He jumped up and walked out of the room. He stormed off back to his room and once there slammed the door behind him. Once in his room he grabbed the book off the round table in the middle of the room, and started to tear it pages at a time. Once all the pages were torn out, the tore the pages into smaller pieces or crumpled them up.

Once his outburst was over he sat at the table and stared at all the pages. He still couldn't understand how the character was like him. She said the character was good, smart, and beautiful. _Shame she would never get to finish it._ He thought.

Loki crossed his arms and rested them on the table to lie his head down on top of his arms. There was a soft knock on the door. "Enter," he commanded. Frigga walked in and sat next to her son.

"I'll apologize for my behavior to everyone later." He muttered when she wrapped an arm around him.

"There is no need for that, they all understand you are mourning. I say the only person you have to apologize to is Thor. You shouldn't have snapped at him like that." She looked down and started to shuffle through the torn or crumpled pages of the book. She found the cover page and looked at it.

"_'Wicked'_? Is this a book Zarina likes?"

"Yes. She was reading it, never even got to the ending. She said the main character, Elphaba, reminded her of me."

"Perhaps you should finish the book for her." Frigga waved her hands over the pages and put the book back together.

"I was about to let Zarina live and Thor die, Mother, I really was." he admitted. "I feel so guilty for letting her die and I feel guilty for almost letting Thor die. I caused her death, those were my enemies and she took the fall for it." he added.

"There is nothing wrong with feeling guilty and her death is not your fault. Those people are sadistic, perhaps they did this because they wanted you to live with the pain. You must be stronger and not seek revenge, be the better person. If anything be the better person for Zarina."

"I will, she wouldn't like it if I the people of Asgard in harms way. In fact she would be quite furious and probably not talk to me for a long time, she's done that before. I just miss her so."

"You were betrothed to her and madly in love with her. I still remember the look on your face when you first saw her after her training. You looked at her like she was the only person in the room and I think that was the moment you finally accepted the betrothal."

"It was, before had I always thought of her as a child, but was willing to do it to make specifically you proud. Then when she got back she was… perfect. After the celebration I was going to ask Father if we could finally wed. Than the threats came up and I was just going to wait until they were gone. Well now _she's_ gone."

"She will live on in your heart, never forget her. Never forget her smile, laugh, fighting stance, or anything about her. Never forget her and let her live on in your heart."

"I will." They both stood up and hugged for the longest time. Loki kept his hands clasped around Frigga's left hand and she placed her right on his cheek. She used her thumb to wipe some tears off his face.

"Now you should bath, it will calm you down. Then go to bed, it's been a long, emotional, day and you need to rest. Tomorrow you will apologize to Thor and go down to Zarina's memorial and read that book. It might sound idiotic, but it'll help."

"I will." They hugged one last time before Frigga left and Loki went off to the bathing chambers.


	4. Engagement

**(A/N: "Amore" means love.)**

It had been a week since I sowar oath to Taegen. I had been doing nothing but training and getting used to the castle. Taegen had gotten me the best bedchambers in the whole castle and my own private bathing chambers. I couldn't really understand why I got such special treatment, I just assumed it was because I was the only female on the guard.

My bedchambers had a canopy bed, large mirror dresser, fireplace and walk in closet. The walls were a lavender color. Everything in here was a lavender or a light lavender, curtains, blankets, pillows, and throw rug. The only thing that wasn't lavender was the dresser that was black, as were my bedside tables on either side of my bed. There was even a vase of lavenders (changed everyday) on one and a candle on the other. I also had many other candle holders around my bedchambers.

Lavender was my favorite color and Taegen wanted me to have the best.

Right now it was dark out, so my curtains had been closed and all the candles and fireplace lit.

Tonight was rather strange, I was in a _dress._ Don't get me wrong, I like dresses, but prefered armor over a dress. I think Taegen had gotten me the dress, one day after training it was just _there_, hanging on a dress mannequin. There was also shoes, jewelry, and makeup on my dresser and more in my closet.

I stared at myself in the mirror. The dress I was in was a one-shoulder gown with a deep purple bodice, and soft billowy black tulle flowing all the way down from the waist to the ground. I had a rather tight corset on, Nissa had tied it too tight. Underneath I had on nylons; they felt strange considering I was usually wearing thick leather tights. I had on black ankle boots with a spiked heel. Because the one-shoulder strap was over my left shoulder a gold arm band cuff-bracelet with layered drop chains was around my upper right arm. I was wearing gold tassel earrings (I was honestly surprised my ears were still pierced.) and a multi-chain tassel necklace. I had dark eye makeup and dark lipstick on my lips.

My servant, Nissa, had braided my hair and made a bun out of that braid. She also put pins with purple gems at the ends in the bun. She left a chunk of hair out of the bun and made a long braid going down the side of my face. She used a gold clasp of some kind to keep it together. Apparently it was Vanaheim customs for Shield Maidens to have a braid.

I even had _paint_ on my_ fingernails_. I refused it, but Nissa insisted upon it. At least she only put on a clear coat then a little bit of white at the tips.

If this was what one considered "beauty" than I guess I _was_ beautiful.

"Do you know what his majesty wishes with me? And why I must dress in this manner?"

"I do not know what he wishes, he just commanded me to get you in the dress." We started to walk out of my bedchambers and down the hall. "And make you look presentable, like the first task wasn't hard enough." She mumbled the last bit under her breath, thinking I didn't hear.

"Excuse me? What was that?" I scolded.

"I am sorry, my lady, I was out of line. I am tired and did not mean to speak out of turn." She got to her knees straight and bent her head away. "I must be flogged for my words."

I stuck my hand out and helped her up. "That won't be necessary, wash my armor, polish my shield, and sharpen my sword, and we can call it even. I shouldn't have been rude, I, too, am tired and still adjusting to this new life." I figured having her do that was a fair punishment, better than being flogged. I didn't like the idea of that.

"Thank you, my lady, thank you."

"You're welcome." I smiled and we kept on walking. When we got to the throne room, she left and I walked in by myself. After I closed the doors, I turned around and started walking to the throne, Taegen sat in his throne and watched me. He was wearing long, red, dress robes with gold embroidery, and a tall, gold, grown sat upon his head.

I couldn't help but keep my eyes locked with his. I still couldn't understand why there was a second throne, I had been wondering about it since I swore oath a week ago. I hadn't seen him with a queen, nor have there been any mention of one.

When I got to the base of the stairs I started to get down to one knee. "There is no need for that." I looked up, confused. He walked down and took my hand, he walked me up to the pair of thrones and sat me down in the smaller one. He then disappeared behind them and when he emerged there was a tiara sitting on a small, red, pillow with gold embroidery and a tassel at each corner. It was a white gold and diamond tiara. Delicate pierced -work flowers and leaves set with shimmering diamonds.

"My lord, I do not understand." He picked up the tiara and threw the pillow on his throne. He placed the tiara on top of my head and took a few steps back.

"You need not to understand, yet… My, my, you look…" He looked me up and down, taking in every detail about me. "Nissa sure did a good job. Tell me, how do you feel right now?"

"I feel tired and a little uncomfortable. I'm not used to dressing in this manner."

"Are you liking your life here? Is everything pleasing?"

"Yes, I enjoy the privacy when I'm not training. I must admit, the other trainees frighten me a bit, they always have covered faces. It is… odd."

"Yes, it must be, not to worry that is true Vanaheim amour. It is meant to be frightening, your armor is suppose to give you a femme fatale. The enemy will underestimate you, not pay much attention, or even be seduced by you; and that is when you take them down."

"I understand, my lord."

"Please call me Taegen."

"I shall try, why did you wish to see me? I still do not understand why you wanted to see me and why I must dress in this manner."

"Ah, I see." He started to walk down the steps, I got up and followed. "Well there is no simpler way to put this: I am in need of a wife. A _queen_." I stopped walking.

He turned to me, "I wish for you to be my queen." If I had been drinking wine, I would have started to choke.

"My lo- _Taegen_… I do not understand. Why me? I am but a warrior, nothing more. I'm not even beautiful."

He walked up to me and placed his hands on my cheeks. "That is where you are wrong. You are smart, beautiful, even without the proper dress, and a fine warrior. I have been simply amore with you, you have been my one true weakness. I feel as though I need to worship the ground you walk on." He pulled a ring out, got down on one knee and took my left hand. "Will you allow me the honor of calling you my wife?"

"I…" I suddenly couldn't breath and felt my chest tighten. _Why did Nissa have to tie my corset so tightly?_ I put my right hand on my chest and tried to calm my breathing. I felt the walls close in on me, I picked up my skirts and started running to the doors of the throne room.

"Zarina?" He called, I turned around. I am pretty sure I had a sheer look of terror and confusion on my face.

"I am truly sorry, my lord… I-I mean Taegen, but I-" then I ran out of the throne room without further explanation. I didn't stop running until I made it to my bedchambers. Once in my bedchambers I walked over to my vanity mirror and braced myself against it. I was breathing heavily and actually wheezing. Looking down at my hands I could see they were trembling, my hands felt numb.

"Nissa!" I called, "Nissa!" I didn't stop calling until someone walked in, it wasn't Nissa. It was some blond haired and light eyed serviant. She wore the usual servient clothing, blue dress, white apron, and white bonnet.

"Yes, my lady?"

"Where is Nissa? Nevermind, just help me get out of the dress." She right away started to undo the hook-and-eye and undo the zipper the dress fell for my ankles. She then started to undo the laces on the corset, once they were loose enough I slid out of that. Thankfully Nissa insisted I wear a thin undershirt under the corset.

Once both of these were off, I felt as though I could breath again. Taking in wonder lung-full breaths of air felt delightful. "My lady, put your hands above your head, it will help you breath better." I followed her instructions, she was right I felt as though I was able to get more air in me.

"Are you ok? What had happened that caused you to suddenly panic?"

"I… uh, it's personal. I feel so cold right now and I feel faint." I wrapped my arms around myself. The servient wrapped her arms around me and guided me to the ottoman at the foot of the bed; she sat me down and then grabbed a blanket to wrap around me. I wrapped it tighter around myself.

"You must calm down, my lady, this type of panic is not good. Just breath in through your nose and out through your mouth, slowly. Here also put one hand on your chest and the other on your abdomen. When you breath in focus on the raising of your abdomen instead of your chest." I placed my hands where she told me to and breathed the way she told me to. After a few minutes I felt myself calm down and I stopped shaking.

"Thank you," once I felt calm enough I stood up and walked back to my clothes. "Please help me get this back on." I grabbed the corset and started to adjust it around my chest. The servient stated to pull the strings and tighten it back up again.

"I am sorry, I do not know your name."

"Elizabeth, my lady." After she finished getting my corset tied, she redid the hook-and-eye and zipper. I walked over to the mirror and checked my hair and makeup, everything was still in shape.

"Thank you, Elizabeth. Now if you'll excuse me, I must go give Taegen an answer."

"An answer to what, my lady?"

"That is none of your business." I barked.

"I'm sorry, my lady, that was not my place."

"No, it is fine. His question has me panicked and I honestly do not know how to answer him."

"Go with the answer that you think is best, not for him, but for you." That actually lifted my spirits.

"Thank you, Elizabeth, that actually helped. Now I must be going."

"Yes, best not leave his majesty waiting." She bowed then left. I took one last look in the mirror and left.

What am I going to say? I _did_ love him, did I not? But marriage? That was unexpected. If I did go with it, I would be a queen. How would that affect my position on the guard? I enjoyed being a warrior because that's what I was trained to do. What would the other warriors think? Would they think I am doing this to get a higher position on the guard? Whoring with him to gain power? If he wanted a whore he could easily get one. But I did love him.

Once I got the the throne room, I knew my answer and it was the best one for me.

Taegen was sitting in his throne, his crown was on the floor and he had his face in his hands with his elbows resting in his knees. I walked up to him and put his crown back on his head. He looked up at me and for once I couldn't tell what he was thinking.

"How about we start that proposal over again." We walked down the stairs and he got on one knee again taking my hand. He pulled out the ring and looked up at me.

"Zarina, will you allow me the honor of calling you my wife?"

"Yes." Joy filled his eyes and he slid the ring on my finger. It was a three stone engagement ring. At the center shines a dazzling diamond highlighted by two deep blue sapphire gems. The band was crafted from gleaming white gold with rows of more diamond gems travelling down each side.

He stood up, placed one hand behind my head and the other at the curve of my back, and drew me close. He placed his lips on mine.


	5. Punishment

**(A/N: A switch is a long, hard, stick. Otherwise called a cane, just not curved at the end. Mostly used for corporal punishment. TW: whipping, flogging, and abuse.)**

* * *

I layed in bed, my make up and hair had been undone. Except for the small braid; that I kept in, but used a small hair tie instead of a gold clasp. I held out my hand in front of me. The diamonds were sparkling from the light of the candles. Before Elizabeth left she lit all the candles in my bedchamber, but kept the fire place unlit. I really liked the way the diamonds sparkled, but I wondered if this was the right choice I was making for myself.

But I loved him, I really loved him.

Just then Nissa ran into my bedchambers, her dress was torn in several places mostly it was torn over her back area. There was blood all over the blue of her dress. She had her arms wrapped around herself and tears streaming down her face. "Nissa!" I yelled and jumped out of bed.

"What happened?" I started to evaluate the wounds on her back, there were deep gashes in her back going from the top of her back, down to the curve of her back. I couldn't even begin to count how many gashes and cuts there were. There was so much blood was pouring down her back.

"I-I was flogged for speaking so harshly of you."

"But I made no mention of it to Taegen. How did they find out?"

"I do not know," I wrapped an arm around her and guided her out of my bedchambers. As we were walking down the hall, I saw a few servants.

"Prepare a bath and healing potions now!" I commanded, they rushed to the bathing chambers and I followed closely behind. The bath chambers had stone floor and walls; the walls were lined with candles. There was a large cupboard with towels, oils, soaps, and scented oils. The bath itself was a large square hole in the ground made out of black marble and a pump in the corner.

A servient had already begun to pump warm water into the bath and pour healing oils in it. I started to undress Nissa and guided her into the bath once she was undress. She hissed in pain and dug her nails into my arms when the water touched her back.

"I'm sorry, my lady, but the water hurts." she whimpered.

"No need to be sorry." I guided her down the few steps. The water made my thin white nightgown get stuck to my skin. I unwrapped my arms from around her and moved around to her back. The bath was now completely full, but the water was only halfway up Nissa's torso.

"Hand me some sponges and mix up the healing herbs with the healing oils." The servants got me the sponges and a bowl of healing mixtures. I submerged the sponge in the water then slowly washed all the blood from her back. Half of it was dry and half was wet; some of the gashes were thin and not deep, but some were very deep. I carefully cleaned the gashes and tried to clean inside the deep ones without hurting her. After I washed her back, I dipped the sponge in the healing mixture and dabbed it on her back. She winced each time I placed the sponge on her back, to that I could only apologize. I felt so helpless and like this was _my_ fault.

After that I lead her out of the tub and wiped off her back. Then I put more of the healing mixture on her back then put thick wraps in her wounds. Once I was done I washed my hands and Nissa got wrapped in a towel. I lead her to my room, I sat her down at the ottoman at the foot of the bed, and went to my closet.

"That is not necessary, my lady."

"It is fine." Just as I came out of my closet with a night dress, Taegen walked in. He was still wearing the same thing as when he proposed to me.

"Zarina, what's going on in here?"

"M-my lord," Nissa exclaimed, I ran over to her and grabbed a blanket to wrap around her. I used my arms to cover up myself. My thin night gown was completely stuck to my body exposing _everything._

"Taegen, I demand to know who hurt _my_ servant."

"I do not know, I shall find out who hurt her. But first, I wish to know what happened." I felt myself stiffen, what she said about me was severely punishable. Considering I was a lady around here, and soon to be queen, it was considered blasphemy.

"Nothing, I handled it." I gulped and hoped he couldn't tell I was lying. I wasn't a very good liar.

He got walked up to me and grabbed my chin, holding my gaze with his he firmly spoke. "I cannot help you unless you or her tells me what happened or what she did to get so harshly punished. Understood? If you do not tell me, then I will have to punish her and you."

Nissa dropped to her knees, hands close to her chest to keep the blanket to her, and head down. "Forgive me, my lord, it was not her majesties' fault. Tonight I spoke fowley of my lady, she gave me some tasks instead of punishment. When I came to her chambers to start what she told me, after I had finished a couple previous tasks, a guard dragged me to the dungeons and had me flogged."

Taegen looked back at me. "And what was this form of 'punishment' you gave her?" He slightly lossed his grip on my chin.

"I told her to wash my armor, polish my shield, and sharpen my sword. I did not wish to see her hurt."

"But that was not your decision to make."

"But she's my servant, she's my _friend."_

"No, she is a slave." He looked down at Nissa. "Get off your knees, you look pathetic." Nissa stood up, but kept her head down. "Guards!" He screamed. Two guards walked in and walked halfway up to us before kneeling.

"Hold her," he said and threw me to the guards. Both of them grabbed an arm and held them behind my back.

He turned to Nissa and snached the nightgown and blanket from her. "Taegen, no! Please stop!" Nissa was shaking and tearing up, but she knew better than to fight back. Then tore off the towel, he turned her around and looked at bandages on her back. They didn't completely go around her torso, they were just enough to cover the marks. He tore that off too, Nissa muffled her pain by putting her hands over her mouth as the bandages peeled off her back.

"Let Zarina go and take this one to the infirmary," he grabbed Nissa by the arm and threw her at the guards. "It does not take two guards to take one slave to the infirmary. Does it not?"

"No, my lord." One of the guards stayed behind as the other walked Nissa out of the room. She was doing her best to cover herself up.

Taegen grabbed my arm and held me tightly. "Go get a switch, the one made of hazel." The guard nodded then left.

"No, Taegen, please no. I didn't do anything wrong." I started to struggle and try to get out of his grip, but he tightened his grip on my arm.

"Helping a slave when punishment was necessary, not giving punishment when it was necessary, and lying to your king."

"Taegen-" I held my hand with the ring on up to his face. "I am your fiancé, does this ring mean nothing to you? We are going to be married, we are going to be _equals!"_

"That does not matter, you need to be punished. Even if we were wed, I would still do the same." He grabbed my other hand and held them both behind my back, he bent me over the bed. He slid my night gown up over my buttocks and he yanked off my underwear. I heard someone walk in, but because my head was at such an awkward angle, I couldn't see who it was.

"My lord, I brought you the switch you asked for."

"Thank you, you are dismissed. Close the door on the way out." He left and I heard the door slam behind him. Soon after I felt the cool wood of the switch brush up against my buttocks.

"Now the number of lashes for your crime is twenty, but I'm doubling that." He tapped the switch against me a few times before pulling back and bringing it down on my backside. I whimpered and winched in pain. He brought it down on me four more times; after that I started to breath heavily and my heart pounded in my chest.

The more he brought it down on me, the more I jumped forward and whimpered. When he got past ten I started to cry; I had hot tears pouring down my face by twenty. When he got past twenty the whips got harder and after thirty, they were unbearable. The last one felt as though it was going to kill me.

Once he stopped and let go of me, I jumped on to the bed and crawled over the other side. I wrapped my arms around myself and stared at Taegen with tears running down my face. I was shaking violently and my buttocks hurt, and burned, and stung, and… just felt terrible.

"Let that be a reminder to you not to lie to me _ever_ again! You hear that?"

"Y-yes, m-my lord. It won't happen again."

"Good," he left. I walked over to the mirror and looked at my buttocks. There were long red marks going horizontally across my buttocks and upper thighs. Some were risen and some were sunk in. Mostly everything was just… _red_ and looked horrible. The skin was mostly red, but there were blueish and purplish spots. I touched it, it felt tender and swollen; I jumped up and breathed sharply.

I threw my underwear in the hamper in the closet, the fabric of the nightgown was chafing against my buttocks enough already and I didn't feel like having the underwear hurt even more. I crawled into bed, not bothering to clean up from what Taegen did to Nissa. My áss hurt with every move and twitch.

Wearing my armor for training was going to be héll tomorrow.

**Taegen's POV**  
Taegen walked back to his chambers and threw the hazel wood switch on the floor. He knew Zarina didn't really deserve that severe form of punishment, but it was necessary. He needed to make sure she was completely under his control. He knew Nissa deserved to be punished for speaking fowl of Zarina, he _wanted_ Nissa to be punished, and put back in her place.

He walked back to the desk in his chamber, there were multiple lit candles and a map. It wasn't a map of Vanaheim, it was a map of Asgard. There were different black "X's" placed at parts of the map.

He heard a soft knock on the door, after letting the person in, they gave a swift bow before speaking. "My lord, I do not think her majesty should part take in training tomorrow. Her… injuries might prove difficult for practice." The guard didn't have his armour on, he was in casual trousers, a shirt, and boots. His brown hair was down to his shoulders, he had light blue eyes and pale skin. He was the guard that had to provide Taegen the switch.

"She will practise as if nothing had happened."

"Yes, my lord, I am sorry. That was not my please."

"No need, you were merely concerned." Taegen walked over to another desk with various potions and ingredients. He started to pour some in a bowl and then mix them.

"My lord, if you do not mind me asking, what is that?"

"There is nothing wrong with curiosity, it is a potion to keep Zarina's mind mine. Now the one that made her loyal to me, only made her loyal. This is going to keep her emotions in check; meaning she's still going to love me, hate Loki, and just keep them the way _I_ want them to be." He poured it into a vial to slip in Zarina's wine tomorrow night.

"Now please leave, I have work to do."

"Yes my lord." He bowed before leaving, softly shutting the door behind him.

Taegen walked back over to the map and drew some more 'X's' in places.

_This is going to work, once I wed Zarina she'll go kill her former lover and take over Asgard._ _Good thing the fool didn't bed her, I knew that from the moment I saw her._ _Her blood smelled of it.__Once I do that, I'll make sure I impregnate her._ _With Asgard ours, she'll rule over Asgard as it's queen and I'll stay in Vanaheim._ _Once we have a son, and I'll make sure it's a son, he'll take over Asgard when the age is right; and Zarina will rule Vanaheim by my side._ _After that, all of the Nine Realms will become ours._

Taegen blew out all but one candle. He picked that one up and walked over to his bed. Laying down and putting his hands behind his head, he continued to gloat about his plans.


	6. Discovery

I twisted and turned my body; dodging, swishing, swinging, and thrusting forward with my sword. The guard I was training with was in normal armor, not the thick covered-face armor they normally wore. This guy had brown hair down to his shoulders, he had light blue eyes and pale skin.

He was dodging my attacks left and right, going easy on me; I could tell, and it was starting to get really annoying. Finally I called it quits, it was already a couple hours past since training ended. I wanted to put more practice in with my sword. I already knew how to use a mace, spear, knife, and bow. All were ok, but a sword was my personal favorite.

We walked over to a bench and he sat down, wiping off some sweat. "My lady you should sit down and rest." I looked down at the spot next to him.

"That is not necessary… I am fine." When I woke up this morning my backside was completely blue and purple. Putting on my armor was awful, simply awful. My underwear and thick leather tights were chafing painfully against the marks. And with every smallest move I made pain shot through me.

"I think I'm going to retire for the day, I shall see you tomorrow. Do not hold back!" I started to leave, but felt a hand on my shoulder.

"I am sorry for holding back. I do not wish to hurt you, my lady."

"I do not care if you hurt me," I shrugged his hand off my shoulder and walked back to my chambers.

**Loki's POV **  
It had been a couple weeks since Zarina got killed. Loki was sitting at Zarina's memorial marker, something Asgard gave to their warriors who died in battle. Even though she didn't die in a fight, everyone considered it honorable that she gave her life for Thor. The marker was a small, golden, plaque with their name, name day, death date, and occupation and status.

He was sitting on the ground with _"Wicked"_ in his hands. He just finished reading the last lines of the book, he closed the book and sighed. Looking down at the plaque, he used his magic to make flowers bloom. Red roses to be exact. He knew Zaraina loved those kinds of flowers.

Taking the book with him, he stood up and started to walk back inside, only to see Sif walking to the same spot.

"Lady Sif, how are you this fine evening?"

"Shut up, Loki." She pushed past him and placed a bouquet of a dozen roses at Zarina's marker.

"Forgive me, but I did not take you as the sentimental type."

"Nor I you," Sif threw back at him. Sif knelt down at the marker and ran her fingertips over the imprints of her name on the plaque. A few tears escaped the corners of her eyes, she quickly wiped them away.

She stood up and started to walk back inside. She pushed past Loki and he started to walk with her.

"Forgive me, but you do not seem upset about this. You only mourned for a day or so." Sif looked down, she sighed before looking back up.

"I put on a strong face in the morning because it's what I have to do, but at night, when I'm alone… I cry myself to sleep. I miss my best friend." A few more tears fell down her face and this time she did nothing to get rid of them.

They walked back to the castle in silence, and once there, departed ways, Loki went back to his chambers. After putting the book back on the shelf and changing into some more comfortable robes, he selected a book about magic and relaxed in his bed.

He only read a few pages in, he couldn't stop thinking about what Sif had said. _Does she really cry herself to sleep?_ He put his book down and walked out of his room. He walked down a couple hallways until he came to a door he knew as Sif's. She lived in the Shield Maidens cordor with everyone else, the men lived on the other end of the castle.

He knocked and heard her mumble something, so he walked in.

"I said go away!" Sif's room was dark, except for the one candle on the bedside table. She was wrapped up in multiple blankets and hides, laying on her side and staring at the flickering flame of the candle. She had streams of tears falling down the side of her face.

"I am sorry, I did not hear you." She jumped when she heard Loki's voice and wrapped one of the thick hides around herself. She had a nightgown on and it was not thin or anything, but she still felt exposed.

"What do you want?" She snarled.

"I just wanted to see if it was true."

"If what was true?"

"If you really do cry yourself to sleep." He walked closer and finally sat at the foot of her bed.

"If you are here to mock me, then it would be best to go a head and get it over with."

"I am not here to mock." Sif sat cross legged and wiped the tears away with the back of her hand. "How much do you miss her?"

"There is not a day that goes by that I don't think of her. She was my best friend, more than that, she was like a sister." Sadness filled her again and more tears fell. Loki reached over and put his hand on her shoulder. She sighed and moved slightly closer to him, accepting the gods act of compassion.

**Meanwhile **  
Odin paced back and forth in his chambers, Frigga was sitting on the edge of the bed reading the parchment in her hands. They both were in comfortable, night time robes. The whole chamber was lit by candles, small and large; also there was a roaring fire.

"This is heinous! Do they dare mock us with their happiness? After what they have done!"

"Perhaps they did not mean to sent us this. It must have been a mistake of their town messenger. Surely they would not intend to mock us with it." Odin walked over to his wife caressed her cheek.

"My dear you are to kind." Frigga put her hand on Odin's. "But who in the Nine Realms would choose to marry a man like him? Not even a man, but an ape."

"Perhaps it was not her choice to make." Frigga's lips pulled up and her eyes filled with distrust.

"I suppose you have a plan."

"I do, I was thinking that if I use my cloaking magic to disguise myself as maid. I will go over there though one of Loki's passages and see for myself who this bride to be is."

"No, absolutely not. I will not put you in harms way."

"You do not need to defend me, I can handle myself." She said firmly.

He looked down, and after some time, looked back up. "I am not going to win this argument, am I?"

She smiled, "No you are not. Need I remind you who saved you from the creacher all those years ago?"

"I can not believe you remembered that. However, you may go tomorrow. My only wish is that you be careful, I would not know what I would do without you, my dear."

"I will as always."

The next morning Frigga got up and dressed quickly before walking out of the castle. She walked for a rather long time, and finally came to a large cave. She calmly walked through it, the reason she calmly walked though it was because she wanted to gather her thoughts and not become in a state of panic. Once in Vanaheim she, disguised herself as a dark haired, light eyed and skin, maid in the type of clothing maids wore. She walked to the castle and in through the back, she wandered around trying to find the bride's chambers.

"Excuse me, but where is my lady's chambers. I am new here and do not know." She asked a guard who was passing. She figured that if the woman was marrying a king, she must be addressed as a lady.

"Follow me," he said and Frigga followed. After sometime of walking, they stopped. "Here it is." he walked away. Frigga turned to the door and knocked a couple times, after she heard a command she walked in.

"Good morning, my lady." She only saw the back of Zarina, and nearly stopped in her tracks when she saw the deep purple and blue bruises on her backside. Zarina herself was trying to wiggle into her leather tights to prepare for practice. She was half in her tights and in a loose undershirt.

"Good morning," she said and finally got her tights on. Groaning in pain in the process.

_Why does that voice sound familiar?_ Frigga asked herself. Then she turned around and looked at Frigga. Frigga's eyes went wide and she gasped. _Zarina?_ She quickly shook her head and tried to push it out of her mind to seem normal.

"Can you please help me into my corset?" She picked it up off the dresser and handed it to her.

"Of course, my lady." She took it and helped Zarina into the corset, she laced the laces through the corset and tightened it. After that she helped Zarina into the rest of her armour: the chain mail, the leather top, and the armor itself. Zarina got into her boots, put her sword sheath around her waist, and sheathed her sword. Zarina pulled her hair into a ponytail and made the same small braid down the side of her face. She picked up her shield and started to walk out.

"That will be all, thank you."

"You are welcome, my lady, but if I may ask: What is with all the marks on your backside?"

"I was punished." She then walked out and Frigga walked back to the secret passage. Once in Asgard she made herself appear normal. She ran to the castle and into the throne room where Odin was going about business.

Once he saw Frigga he dismissed everyone. "What happened? Are you hurt?" He embraced her in his arms and gently kissed her on the top of her head.

"No… but we must take this to our chambers. It be best to keep it out of prying ears."

"Right," they rushed to their chambers and slammed the door. Frigga did a quick spell to seal the room, to be sure no one could listen in on them.

"The bride to be is Zarina." She was half frantic by now, she knew Zarina and loved her like a daughter. Zarina was the child she took in.

Frigga remembers the day she and Odin were hunting by foot. When they had returned to the castle and sitting in the throne room, a child was thrown at the base of the thrones for attempting to steal from the kitchens. Frigga had immediately picked up the child and cut off the rope from her wrists, she was infuriated that the guards would tie a small child's hands behind her back. She had immediately started to take care of the child, after a day or so she convinced Odin to let her stay.

Frigga remembers as young, wild, Zarina was screaming at Odin because she did not want to be betrothed to Loki. Odin forced her to become a Shield Maiden to force her to learn respect, responsibility, and control of herself. Frigga was mad at first, but understood that it was necessary. When Zarina came back years later, she saw a strong, beautiful, woman who respected her higher ups. She had also accepted the betrothal and apologized to Odin.

She remembered everything, the good and the bad. When Thor and Loki came back and informed her Zarina was dead, she broke down. Now to know she's _alive,_ she feels as though she doesn't know what to do.

"That cannot be possible, she is dead."

"Yes, that is what he must have wanted us to think."

"How did she appear?"

"She seemed normal, she was in armor and heading out for training just like it was another day here." Then she remembered the bruises on her backside. "Except…" she couldn't even begin to say the words.

"Except what?"

"She had awful bruises on her backside, deep purple and blue. When I asked what had happened she simply said she was punished. It looked as though someone had taken a switch to her. It was awful, just awful." She wrapped her arms around herself and sat at the foot of the bed.

"I am so sorry my dear," Odin wrapped his arms around Frigga. "We mustn't tell Loki about this. He can not know Zarina is still alive." Odin sat at the edge of the bed with her.

"No, he would cause more trouble, but we can not just leave her there."

"I shall think of something, but we must also keep the safety of Asgard in mind. Alive or dead she would not like the thought of Asgard at risk."

**Two weeks later **  
**Zarina's POV **  
It was the day after the wedding, I was lying in bed next to Taegen. Naked. Thankfully my backside had completely healed.

The wedding day had gone perfectly, I wore an absolutely stunning dress was a strapless fitted sweetheart-neckline bodice and dropped waist. To augment the voluminous mermaid flare, decadent layers of feathery ruffles tumbled from an asymmetrical seam down to the trailing hemline. I wore the same gold tassel earrings and necklace, and arm cuff on my right arm that he proposed to me in. I had simple white flats for shoes and a braided bun for hair. I had pins with white diamonds on the ends in my hair. My make up made me look stunning. My bouquet of flowers were all red roses, freshly cut.

I was allowed to wear my tiara, but during the crowning ceremony, that happened shortly after the wedding. It was taken off and a new one in its place. This one was a natural pearl and diamond crown, the pearl and diamond ornate scrolls graduated from the center and suspended from a row of alternate. I liked this one a lot, but also like the first one because of the earthy look it had. Thankfully I got to keep both.

Right now I was lying in bed, fully naked. Even my hair pins had been taken out. After the wedding and crowning ceremony, and a considerable amount of celebration. I was taken to a small room put in sexy lingerie and hand my makeup and hair undone. Then I went into Taegen's bedchambers where he was undressed except for his trousers. It was after that he bedded me.

To be honest, I do not know how it felt. It felt strange, yet so enjoyable at the same time. He was slow and intimate with me. He took time to make sure I was happy and pleased before we pleased himself. He did not rush me or force my to do anything I did not feel comfortable doing. When I started to feel a twinge of pain, he stopped and waited for give a single to continue.

Taegen was pressed right up against me with an arm wrapped around me. I tried to move, but his strong arms held me still. After a while he sat up and stretched, I sat up too and wrapped the blanket around myself.

He turned to me, "Good morning, my queen."

"Good morning, my king." I smiled and laughed, he came closer to me and placed a kiss on my lips.

He went down to my belly area. "And good morning to you too, my little prince."

I giggled a little. "It is too early to know for sure."

"Well we must remain hopeful."

"Yes, we must."

We both got dressed, I got into the same jewelry I wore yesterday, my crown, and a simple strapless dress. Instead of flats, I got into a pair of boots. Boots were always really comfortable for me. I just brushed my hair instead of doing anything with it, and put on slight make up. Taegen go into some simple robes as well.

We walked to the throne room where I took place on my throne. Mine was still a little smaller than Taegen's, but slightly bigger than what I had the last time. Once sitting I crossed my legs and put my hands in my lap.

"My precious Zarina, I assume you have been wondering why I have put you through such rigorous training."

"I have, but I figured it was simply for the best and to expand my skills."

"True, but I also have a mission for you."

Finally. "And that is?"

"I want you too go to Asgard and kill Loki. Do you accept?"

"Yes," I said right away. It was going to be fun to get revenge on the man I hated.


	7. Warrior

**(TW: Räpe (sorta) and abuse)**

* * *

It had been a week since I got married and crowned queen. I was now about start final testing to become a true Vanaheim warrior.

For final testing, we entered a arena one at a time and had to kill a wild animal that was released. The animal was well hidden and well guarded. We had to find it, stalk it, kill it, and fight off anyone who got in the way. The guards were in their armor but had layers of padding on over that. We were to remove a chunk of the padding to make as though we had killed them. If they were hit with something, they would walk away.

One nice advantage they give was hiding weapons throughout the arena, because in battle weapons would be laying around at random and we have to take advantage of that.

My animal was a fully grown male Elk. Full set of anthers and sharp teeth/hooves. It had green and brown fur, and moss going on it's body. So it blended it in perfectly with its surroundings. It took me near half an hour to find it and another half an hour to kill it. Once I found it I stalked it for a long time, waiting for the perfect opportunity to kill it. Each time I thought I was going to strike, a warrior came out of the shadows and I would have to "kill" him. When I got close enough I used my bow, the one I found, and shot it in the head.

Because Elk skull are really thick, the arrow didn't go all the way through to kill it. The only true way to kill it was to cut it's head off. Then the Elk did the worst possible thing: it started charging at me. I quickly scrambled up a tree and shot more arrows at it. The arrows were dipped in some sort of neurotoxin, that would cause it to weaken. The Elk hit the tree over and over again with it's large antlers, it's antlers were a monstrous size and very sharp at the tips. They made up more than half of it's body. The more it hit the tree, the more it shook and I was starting to lose my footing.

Then I finally fell, I fell onto it's back and held on for dear life. It started to buck and kick everything all around it. It tried to turn his head and bite me with his sharp teeth. The Elk here were carnivores, so they have tremendously sharp teeth, and they knew how to use them well. I unsheathed a small dagger that was on my waist, next to my sword, and raised the dagger above my head before plunging it down into the back of the Elk right between the shoulder blades.

It thrashed even more than before, screeching and crying in pain. It kept throwing his head back trying to get me with its antlers. I brought the dagger up the back of it's neck and let the sharp blade wound it even more. Blood was pouring out of the long, deep, cut and the Elk finally went down. I kicked it many times over again to get it off my left leg that was pinned under the large animal.

Standing up, I sheathed my dagger back to my waist and grabbed a large battle axe that was strapped to my back. I raised it above my head and brought it down on the neck of the animal over and over again. The Elk screeched and thrashed around in pain, but despite all this, I heard someone come up behind me. I turned, dropped my axe and grabbed my sword, and "killed" them quickly. It was a small group of five men, all tried to fight me, but I was smarter and used my small size and agility to my advantage. But not before they got a small cut on my upper arm just under my armor.

After that was done, I kept bringing the axe down again and again until I lobed of the head of the Elk. The cut was just under my armor so each time I moved my arm, it rubbed against the chainmail and leather. I put the axe back on my back and took out my dagger again. I kneeled down and started to work my dagger around the base of the antlers. After a few minutes of cutting and hacking I finally got the antlers off the Elk.

I put away my dagger, grabbed the antlers, and started to walk out of the arena. Once I exited the arena, Taegen was there waiting with a huge smile and look of pride. I felt happy, yet dirty at the same time. I had Elk blood all over me, splattered across my armour and places where my skin shown, and across my face. I was all sweaty and dirty, my hair (Which was in a long braid with a small braid down the side of my face.) was all messy and loose strands were stuck to my face.

"My dear, Zarina, you did it. How do you feel?" I put the antlers down and hugged my king.

"Tired mostly, but I accomplished the task."

"Yes you did, you are now a true warrior. Tonight I wish to talk to you." I pulled back.

"Oh?"

"Do not fret, dear, it not nothing to worry about."

"Ok, may I at least know what it is about?"

"Like I said, it is nothing to fret about. Are you hut?" He pointed to the spot on my arm.

"Yes, it is just a small cut. No big deal." I picked up the antlers and we started walking back to the castle. I was the last one to go, everyone that passed got their reward hung in the castle walls. Because I was queen I got mine in a very special spot, Taegen just didn't tell me were.

"After you bathe, I will dress the wound for you."

"Yes, my king." Once inside the castle someone took my antlers and a maid took me to my bath chambers. There was already a hot bath ready. Maids all around me quickly removed my armour, undid my hair, and got me into the bath.

The hot water felt great against my skin and it made me feel relaxed. I grabbed a sponge and started to scrub at my skin. I washed off all the blood, dirt, sweat, and I'm pretty sure a layer of skin. It was difficult to wash anywhere near the cut on my arm, when I got close to it, it stung and burned. I hissed through my teeth a few times. After I was done with that I washed my hair, the hot water running through my hair felt amazing, and it felt great once I had my hair washed.

Once I was done, I pulled the plug on the drain, and got out, wrapping a robe around myself. My maids quickly started to dry my hair, brush it, and braid it as before. Once I was dried off, they started to dress me.

I was put in undergarments and my corset. Next went on a long, red dress; it clung to my curves and stopped just at my ankles. It was a strapless dress and the edges were lined with red gems of some kind. Next I put on a red with gold embroidered robes, it hung loosely around me and swooped over the floor. I slipped into some boots and put my rings back on. Last I put on my crown, put on some simple jewelry and makeup on.

"Zarina, are you decent?"

"Yes, my king." Taegen walked in he had some cleaning oils and cloth in his hands.

"Oh, I honestly forgot about that." He chuckled a little.

"You out!" He commanded the maids.

"Wait, I want you to wash and polish my armour and shield, then sharpen my sword. Leave my dagger." They bowed, grabbed my armour and weapons, and left. One of them picked up my dagger and put it on a table off to the side.

I took off my red robe and sat down. Taegen started to gently wash it out before applying healing oils. The oils stung and burned, hissed through my teeth as I clenched my jaw, trying to work through the pain.

"I am sorry, my dear Zarina." He said as he started to wrap the cloth around my arm.

"What are you sorry for, it is just pain. I am fine." Once he was done he shoved everything aside and stood up. I stood up and put my robe back on, I walked over to the mirror and looked at myself. Taegen came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, his hands found my belly and he ran his hands over it. "I hope I can give you a prince. I pray to all the gods I can."

"Do not worry, you will and you will be a fantastic mother."

"And you will be a fantastic father."

He smiled, "When was the last time you bled?"

"A little less than a month ago, we've still got another couple days before we know for sure."

"Understood, now come with me to dinner. There is a feast for the accomplishments you all had today." He gave me a kiss before turning.

"I will just be one more minute. I must finish a few things." He nodded and left me be. I did not really have anything to finished, well outside of my makeup, I just wanted to be alone for minuet. I really did not think I was going to provide Taegen with a son, I feared I would have a daughter or no child at all.

I sighed and quickly strapped my dagger to my waist. I felt safer with it around my waist for some reason. And I was right to assume so. As I was walking down the hall to the dining room, I was grabbed from behind and thrown on the ground. I quickly unsheathed my dagger and got up.

I turned only to see a guard. "What are you doing? Why are you attacking your queen?" They did not answer only attack. The guard held my right hand, which was the hand with the dagger, above my head pinned to the wall. He pinned my other hand along with the first and pinned my body to the wall. With his free hand started to roughly grope my breasts.

"Let me go, you will be executed for your actions!" I screamed at him. The guard then removed my robe, I heard the large fabric all to the floor. I tried to haul my body up so I could kick him, it did not work because of the way my body was pinned against the wall. The guard started to run his hands over my thighs though my dress, he pulled the fabric up and shoved a hand under my dress. I felt his hand start to run over my private parts. I tried to get away, thrashing my body around, but he was stronger than me and easily held me down.

"Let her go!" I heard a voice say, I turned my head and saw Nissa. She had my sword in her hands and raised.

"Nissa, get out of here!" I was so worried she was going to get hurt, I would much rather I get räped than her.

"I am sorry, my lady, I have to disobey."

"Nissa, please." I wined. The guard noticed her, but must have not seen her as a threat, for he kept attacking me. Just then he fell to the ground, I collected myself quickly and took the sword from Nissa. The guard was twisting and turning in pain, I silenced him by burying half my sword in his body. I turned to see Nissa with my dagger in her hands hacking away at her dress.

"What are you doing?"

"I will be the one he attacked, it mustn't be you because of obvious reasons."

"But…" The more I thought about it, the more it dawned on me. "You would be executed if they knew of what happened. It would not matter if you were saving me." I looked up at her, she had torn the front side of her dress, exposing her breasts and stopping just at her navel. "I do not want that to happen to you." I quickly picked up my robe and put it on.

"Right… I think I hear someone coming." She right away was able to make herself cry, I took the dagger from her and put it back in the sheath. Nissa got to her knees and I followed her, wrapping my arms around her.

Just than Taegen ran in with a few guards. "My queen, are you hurt." He kneeled down by me and put one hand on each side of my face.

"No, I am fine."

"Good, then would you mind telling me the meaning of all this?" He pointed to the guard.

"He was trying to hurt Nissa, when I commanded him to get off her, he turned to me and attacked me. I had to choice but to kill him or else he would have killed me."

"Right, how did you get your sward. Last I knew of a servant took it." His voice and face said he was convinced with what we had said, but his eyes said a different story.

"I was bringing it to the armory clean and sharpen it when I was attacked." Nissa said, I looked over and she was trying to hold her dress together.

"You two, take this one back to the servant quarters. You take the Queen's sword to the armory and have it cleaned and sharpened. And, finally, you get a couple other guards to clean up this mess." They all nodded and went about their orders. Taegen helped me up and held his arms locked around his waist.

"Are you sure you are ok, my queen."

"Yes, I am fine. I am just worried about Nissa."

"As naturally you would be. Now, come, we have a celebration feast to attend too."

"Right, if I may ask how did you know what was going on?"

"Some guard heard your servant yelling and came to get me." I nodded and we kept walking over to the dining area.

The night was filled with celebration, cheering, good food, dancing, and song. The food was fantastic, it was possibly the best thing I had ever tasted. The wine however, tasted and smelled awful, whenever I brought the chalice to my lips I would gag and almost feel as though I would throw up. So I switched to water. As the night was drawing to a close, or so I thought, everyone would start up calibrations again. When it stopped Taegen and I went up to our chamber, once inside I layed on the bed.

"You seem exhausted."

"Because I am, for some reason I am more tired than I normally would be. During the feast I was more hungry than I normally would be. Not to mechon the wine made me want to throw up."

"Perhaps it was just the stress of the day and with what happened with your servant. That must not have rested easily with you."

I sighed and sat up. "Perhaps." I stood up and started to take off my crown, jewelry, and makeup. I then just stripped entirely, staying in my underwear and corset. Taegen came up behind me and started to unlace my corset. Looking at my breasts I noticed some slight bruising.

"There was something about the little stunt you and your servant pulled today that made me suspicious." I froze and my heart started to pound in my chest.

"What ever do you mean, my king?"

"It did not seem real… and now-" he had finished unlacing my corset and ripped it off. "You have bruises on your breasts, fresh ones too, and I know I did not put them there." I started to shake.

"I am sorry, I lied before, but with good reason."

"That being?"

"T-The guard was going to räpe me and Nissa came and initially took him down. However I was the one to kill him. Please-" I got to my knees. "Do not punish her, but punish me instead." I was practically crying now, I did not want to see my only friend hurt or dead.

"Fine, go lean over the bedside and put your hands behind your back." I stood up with shaky legs and walked over to the bed, I leaned over the side and put my hands behind my back, my heart was pounding in my chest. I heard him rummaging around for something, but I was too scared to turn around and see what he was getting.

Then I felt him roughly pull my underwear down and off, and grasp my hands by the wrists. I gasped with I felt the cool wood of the switch brush against my backside.

"For killing a guard and lying to your king that adds up to ninety strikes. Seventy for killing the guard and twenty for lying to your king. However because you chose to have your servants', a _slave,_ punishment added to yours that adds up to One hundred thirty. Forty for her striking a guard. However I am going to add twenty more for allowing yourself to almost be räped. That adds up to one hundred fifty." This was going to kill me. "And I want you to count. Understood?"

"I understand…"

He rubbed it against my backside before I felt a sharp _thwack._ "One."

_Thwack, thwack, thwack, thwack._

"Two, three, four, five." The hits were hard, very hard. Last time when this happened it was only the last one that hurt the most. Each hit was like the last one from the last time I was punished. I had tears pouring down my face.

_Thwack, thwack, thwack, thwack._

"Ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen."

If I wasn't mistaken, each hit was getting harder. Whenever I spoke my voice was raw and shaking, I could feel the pain radiating throughout my whole body, not just my backside. But the pain in my backside was the worst, not only was it throbbing, but stinging and burning as well.

_Thwack, thwack, thwack, thwack._

"Twenty six, twenty seven, twenty eight, twenty nine." I swear I could hear him breathing heavily.

_Thwack, thwack, thwack, thwack._

"Thirty two, thirty three, thirty four, thirty five." My breathing was hitched and I could feel a deep throaty gasp escaped my lips. My cry was now a dry cry, I couldn't make any noises or pleas, but tears kept streaming down my face.

_Thwack, thwack, thwack, thwack._

"Forty five, forty six, forty seven, forty eight." I was starting to feel weak, my legs and arms were getting cramped from being in this position for so long. My knees felt weak and I couldn't support myself anymore.

_Thwack… thwack... thwack… thwack._

"Fifty six, fifty seven, fifty eight, fifty nine." How long was this going to go on? He was now taking this slowly and stretching out the pain.

_Thwack... thwack... thwack... thwack._

"Sixty eight, sixty nine, seventy, seventy one." I felt an awful taste of acid in my mouth, then I felt something start to come up, but I did my best to swallow it.

_Thwack… thwack… thwack… thwack._

"Eighty four, eighty five, eighty six, eighty seven." I kept swallowing trying to keep down what was going to come up.

_Thwack… thwack… thwack… thwack._

"Ninety seven, ninety eight, ninety nine, one hundred." Fifty more to go.

_Thwack… thwack… thwack… thwack._

"One hundred five, one hundred six, one hundred seven, one hundred eight." Dear gods, just kill me now. Please, I am begging you.

_Thwack… thwack… thwack… thwack._

"One hundred eleven, one hundred twelve, one hundred thirteen, one hundred fourteen." Please…

_Thwack… thwack… thwack… thwack._

"One hundred twenty, one hundred twenty one, one hundred twenty two, one hundred twenty three." Nothing, the gods were not willing to hear me out.

_Thwack… thwack… thwack… thwack._

"One hundred thirty four, one hundred thirty five, one hundred thirty six, one hundred thirty seven." Perhaps my crimes were too great, but I was willing to take on the punishment of a servants as well as mine. Would that give me some brownie points with the gods?

_Thwack… thwack… thwack… thwack_

"One hundred forty six, one hundred forty seven, one hundred forty eight, one hundred forty nine." I guess not.

_THWACK_

"One hundred fifty." After he was done, he let me go and I heard him throw the switch back to where ever he got it. The pain was throbbing and burning, and I could not move. I think I even felt blood trickle down my back side and thighs.

I then tried to stand up, but I couldn't I fell to my hands and knees. Taegen gently picked me up and wrapped me in his arms. I was shaking and trembling, Taegen was gently stroking my back and kissing the top of my head.

"You understand why I punished you, correct?"

"Y-yes, I do my king." He picked me up and gently placed me on the bed, thankfully he placed me on my front side and lightly put the blankets over my. It hurt a little, but the warmth felt nice. I wrapped my arms around my pillow. I could hear him disrobe and draw the curtains on the four poster bed. He got into bed, fully exposed, and drew the rest of the curtains before getting under the covers with me. He pulled me into his arms and lightly placed his lips on mine.

"You said you wanted to talk to me tonight?"

"Ah yes, but we will discuss that tomorrow. Understand?"

"Yes, my king." I curled up just slightly and quickly fell into a stiff sleep.


	8. Battle

I woke to something cold and wet being pressed against my backside. Despite it being strange, it seemed to sooth whatever bruises I must have. I whimpered and flinched when I felt a hand press the cloth down.

"I did not know you were awake, my lady." I turned to see who it was, it was Nissa. The cloth on my buttocks was white except for the streaks of blood going across it.

"It is fine, are you alright? You did not get punished?"

"Correct my lady." I sighed a breath of relief and buried my face in the pillows. At least the gods had enough sense to spare her. I looked over to the other side of the bed, Taegen wasn't there thankfully. All the bed curtains and window curtains had been pulled back.

"If you do not mind me asking, how many times did he take it to you?"

"One hundred fifty times, I took on your punishment as well. That is why you did not get punished."

"But, my lady, you did not have to do that."

"It is fine, I begged him to give me your punishment. I did not wish to see you hurt." I then heard the chambers door open and slam close.

"You, what are you doing?" It was Taegen. I immediately sat up, the cloth fell off me and I sat down, hissing in pain as my backside chafed against the fabric of the bedsheets. Taegen had obviously been up for some time now, he wore elegant blue-gold dress robes and his crown sat upon his head.

Taegen had Nissa by her arm, while looking down, she answered. "I was putting a cold, wet, cloth with healing oils on it to help soothe the… wounds and make sure they do not infect. They could get infected if not taken care of properly." While looking at Nissa, he let her go and walked over to the wardrobe, and grabbed a nightgown. He threw it at me and I quickly scrambled to put it on.

Taegen took Nissa by the arm again. "They did not get infected the last time, she is fine."

"Last time she was not bleeding because you did not take the switch to her one hundred fifty times!" Her voice got louder with each word. _Nissa, why?_

"That is most certainly not your place." He raised a hand up and brought it down across face and she fell down to the floor. She lifted up her head and made eye contact with Taegen.

Without thinking I jumped off the bed and got in between them. My legs were shaking as pain ran through me. "Taegen, my darling king, please don't. She was just being a stupid girl, right Nissa?" I turned and looked at her, eyes pleaing.

"Yes, my lord, I was being a stupid girl. I was mealy concerned with my queen."

"See? She was just concerned about me that is all. Please, I beg of you, do not give her a punishment. It was only a woman's foolish emotions getting in the way."

"Are you telling me what to do?" Shit.

"No, my king, I was not."

"Zarina get out of the way, I can handle whatever punishment I get." Nissa stood up.

"You will not give your queen an order and you will address her as 'my lady'." He looked over at me. "Get outta my way, Zarina, now!"

"No, please, Taegen, I-" I got down on my knees. "I beg of you, please do not hurt my friend."

"Only a fool would befriend a slave, now move!" He grabbed my arm, picked me up, and pushed me away. I landed on my backside, crying in pain when pain shot through my whole body. I tried to get to my feet, but it was no use; I could only watch as Taegen unsheathed a small dagger that must have been tied to his waist and started walking toward Nissa.

"No, Taegen, please no!" I screamed over and over again, I tried to get up again, but could not. The pain was too great. "Please no, she is my only friend!"

He stopped and turned to me. "Only friend?" He bent down, grabbed my left wrist and pulled me to my feet. I whimpered in pain some more.

"I am your friend as well. I am your husband, your king. You belong to me, I own you! We are equals, or does this ring mean nothing to you?" He threw me back on the floor. He walked over to Nissa, picked her up by her arm and thrust the dagger into her chest. I screamed and put my hands over my mouth, right away tears started to fall down my face.

I watched as blood poured out of the wound and as Nissa had trouble breathing. Then she fell to the floor and, after a few agonizing minutes of coughing up blood, she stopped moving. Stopped breathing. Stopped living.

Taegen sheathed the dagger and walked over to me. He picked me up and forced me to a door by the wardrobe door. It was a door I never bothered to ask what was inside it, figured it was not my business. Taegen pulled out a key and opened the door. Walking in the powerful smell of potions and ingredients hit me. The walls were lined with jars of ingredients, wet and dry ones, and some looked to be completed potions. Taegen let me go and walked to the table, there he picked up a large vial with a clear liquid. He poured the entire contents in a chalice, picking up two more large vials, another clear one and a thick black one he poured them along with the first one. Taking a small stir stick he mixed them up, muttering something as the liquid started to bubble.

He brought the chalice over to me. "Drink it, all of it." I took the chalice and brought it to my lips. Taking a deep breath, I swallowed all the liquid in a few gulps.

It was like someone had shot some form of electricity through my body, I shook and dropped to my hands and knees. Then the pain shot to my head, it was like high amounts of electricity shot through my head. All my own emotions were driven out, hated, loathing, fear; and only love, loyalty, and lust were replaced. Just like when I first showed up.

Taegen crouched down by me, grabbed me by my hair and held my head back. "Who is your true king?"

"You are."

"Who is your husband?"

"You are."

"Who own's you?"

"You do."

"Who do you belong to?"

"You."

"Who swoar oath to me many months ago?"

"I did."

"Do you remember your oath?"

"Yes."

"Good, now repeat that oath."

"I, Zarina ex-warrior of Asgard, solemnly swear my sword, my allegiance, and life, to King Taegen sole ruler of Vanaheim. To live and die under his rule, and if I betray my king, then so shall I be punished with accordance to my crime. I shall live and die by this oath. I shall wear no crowns and win no glory. I am the sword in the darkness. I am the shield that guards the realms of men and women. I pledge my life and honor to Vanaheim."

"You, do best to remember that oath. Or else your punishment will not be a simple cane to your bare backside."

"Yes, my lord."

"Good, any questions?"

"The oath says 'wear no crowns', but I wear one… I-I do not understand."

"Hm… fair enough. That I just the oath Vanaheim warriors say when swearing their allegiance to me, and now to you too, but because you are my queen as well as a warrior. That part does not really apply to you."

"Oh."

"Anymore questions?"

"No, my king."

"Good, now go put your armor on." I got up and walked out of the strange room. Nissa's body had been removed and the blood cleaned up.

I walked over to the wardrobe and started to put on a pair of undergarments. I put my corset to my chest and started to fumble with the laces. Taegen came up behind me and started to tighten the laces. Once he was done he started to walk away as I started to pull on my leather tights. When all of a sudden I felt a sharp pain come down on my backside, a pain piercing every nerve. I cried out and hand to grip the vanity for support. Taegen came up behind me and held me close to him. I felt his lips graze my ear.

"Do not forget who owns you, understood."

"Yes, my king." I whimpered. He left and I was alone to put my armor on. Before I did I quickly turned to see the bruises on my backside. The deep blue and purple, almost black, bruises across my buttocks and half my upper thighs.

Soon after a few maids came in and started to fix up the bed chamber. One came over to me and helped me get into my armor, then the same one did my hair, putting it into a braid down my back with a smaller braid down the side of my face.

After that I went down to the throne room, Taegen was there waiting. "Ah, Zarina, you look very lovely, very lovely indeed."

I looked down at myself. "I do not understand, you have seen me wear my amour many times."

"Well, yes, but you look extra lovely today. You seem to have a glow about you today."

"My lord, if I may intervene." A maid asked.

"Sure, but make it quick."

"I have been keeping a close eye on her since the wedding night. And I have notices some... symptoms… fatigue, hunger, nausea, and a few other things… my lady is with child." I stiffened and ran my hands over my belly.

"Oh what a merry day it is!" He grabbed me and ran a hand over my belly.

"Yes it is, being with your child will give me no greater joy." I said dryly and forced a smile.

"Now, everyone out, I wish to talk to my queen alone." Everyone left and we were alone. "How do you feel, my dear?"

"Fine, my lord." I walked over to my throne and sat down. The pain in my buttocks tingled and stung, but I hid it. Taegen followed me and stood in front of me.

"Now three things I want to talk about, two are very small and one is major. The first small thing is… look up." He pointed to something above me, I turned and looked up. The antlers from yesterday were polished and hung on the wall behind me and a few feet above my throne.

"I thought they were bigger." Taegen chuckled at that.

"That is the second thing I wish to talk to you about. Or rather show you." He walked over to the side of his throne, bent over, and picked something up. He held it behind his back, "Close your eyes and hold out your hands." I did as he told and I felt something cold and solid in my hands.

Looking down I saw it was a helmet, silver just like my armor. The back was completely rounded and straight then the fronts moved down into points. The top curved out and looked like a beak of some kind, on the top were some sawed off parts of the antlers. The antlers were a couple feet tall and all the points had some metal spikes from them. Taegen took it from my hands and gently placed it on my on my head. It was a snug fit, but it was not too heavy and did not obstruct my vision.

"Here have a look." He picked up a mirror from the floor and held in front of me. The sides that pointed down trised my jaw line and the beak shaped part, was a few inches above the top part of my nose.

"Oh my…" I didn't know what to say, I looked beautiful and fierce. But I did not even recognize myself. I could not recognize the person with emotionless eyes and a blank face looking back at me.

"Now," he put the mirror in the same spot he had it before, sat down in his throne and turned to me. "The last thing I need to talk to you about, is your very important mission."

"Yes, killing my former betrothed." I smiled, the thought of running my sword through him gave me no greater joy.

"In the middle of the night you will go to Asgard, through a secret passage, kill Loki and his brother, and who ever gets in the way. Destroy the throne of Asgard and claim the soldiers sowards as yours. There you will rule Asgard until our son becomes of age to rule Asgard, then you will come back to Vanaheim to rule by my side."

"Perfect," a smirk crossed my lips.

"Wonderful! Now I want you to put a final bit of training in before you go, also practice with your helmet on so you get used to the feel. At five o'clock this evening come to the dining hall and eat something. Then I want you to rest for a few hours before going to Asgard and taking over."

"Yes, my king." I got up and started walking down the steps, but Taegen grabbed me. I turned around and was met with him pulling me close to him and his lips crushed mine. I wrapped my arms around him and he tightened his arms around my waist. He pulled away and ran his knuckle over my cheek.

"I do love you, my queen."

"And I love you, my king." I smiled before turning on my heals and heading to the training grounds.

Throughout the day I practiced with a dagger and my sword. One of the other warriors I was training with said that, because I was an official Vanaheim warrior, I should name my sword. I named it Spirit. I also practiced hand-to-hand combat and a mace some more, the hand-to-hand combat I was good at, the mace… not so much. But practicing with my helmet on was a good idea, it gave me a good feel of how it moved and worked. A lot of the other warriors said I looked more threatening, yet still looked like a queen. A few said the anther parts were a little over kill, but still thought of me as threatening.

When it was time I quickly washed up and went down for supper. I filled up on meats and vegetables, drinking water instead of wine because the smell still made me ill. Taegen gave some sort of special nectar from a plant of some sort that would give me strength and energy. Taegen also put a few other potions in it that would heal any minor wounds I got, protect the baby, (Despite me telling him it would be fine because it was too early.) and one to keep my stamina high.

After supper I went to our chambers, removed my armour and clothing and climbed into bed. Taegen came in, disrobed and climbed in alongside of me, wrapping me in his arms; I quickly fell asleep. When I woke I quickly put on my armor and tied Spirit and my dagger to my waist. I had taken the large braid out of my hair, but kept small one down the side of my face. I found the large braid to be too uncomfortable with my helmet.

I put my helmet on my head, grabbed my shield, and just stared at myself. My heart was pounding in my chest, the minute I stepped foot on Asgard I would be a traidor… of course I already was one the second I swoar oath to Vanaheim. I would be killed or captured, so failure was not an option.

Taegen came up behind me, robed as well. "You will do great, my queen, just remember failure is not an option. Also leave your rings on, I want Asgard and that mule to know who owns you." I turned around to face him.

"I know, I have already told myself that and yes, my king."

"Good, now I will guide you to the passage I want you to take. Once in Asgard go straight for the castle and you know the rest, tell me the rest."

"I will kill Loki and his brother, and who ever gets in the way. I will destroy the throne of Asgard and claim the soldiers sowards as mine. There I will rule Asgard until our son becomes of age."

"Good, but you are not claiming their swords as yours, you are claiming them as mine."

"Understood, my king." I lowered my head, but still keeping eye contact with him.

"Now one last drink for good luck?"

"Yes," I watched him walk over to a pair of chalices pour some some wine in one and something else in the other. He handed me the one that had the mysterious drink.

"It is just grape juice, no alcohol. I understand the smell makes you ill."

"Thank you," we tapped our chalices together and drank the celebratory liquid. Right away I felt more pain shoot through my head, and, again, my own emotions were driven out and only love, loyalty, and lust for him were replaced. I felt as though my brain was being pulled out, played with, and something else was put back in. My thoughts were not my own, I only wanted to obey orders Taegen gave me at all costs.

"Now I will show you the secret passage, follow me." He took my hand and I followed him into the forest and into a cave. "Go through this cave, you will end up in Asgard and you know the rest. Send me a message when you take over Asgard."

"I will." He pulled me in for a kiss before I turned around and left. I walked through the cave quickly, soon white sparks with rainbow colors flew all around me and then I was in Asgard. I walked through the familiar woods for a while until I came across the back entrance of the castle. I quickly started walking to my former lover's chambers, I still remembered where it was.

I rounded a corner when I saw a familiar face. "Hello Sif." She looked up at me with great confusion, her eyes widened and her mouth fell into an "O" shape. She was in her armor, but was free of a shield or weapon.

"Z-Zarina? You are alive?"

"Obviously," my lips curved into a smile. She quickly turned on her heels and started running in the direction of the throne room. I unsheathed my dagger and threw it at her, it landed in her lower thigh. Crying in pain, she fell to the ground; quickly turning around to pull it out.

"Zarina, what is this foolishness? This is not like you at all!" She tried scooting herself back to get away, but stopped when I was standing over her.

"Foolishness? I am taking out orders my king gave me… and you'd do best to get out of my way."

"Your king? Your king is the Allfather! Not Taegen! Your home is Asgard, not Vanaheim! Please I beg of you, know where your loyalties lay." I took out my sword and placed the tip at the hollow of her throat.

"Taegen is my true king! Vanaheim is my home! And I will soon rule over Asgard." I chuckled a little. Sif dropped the dagger and grabbed my sword, immediately blood started to trickle out of her hands. She twisted her body and some how managed to get to her feet and grabbing the dagger at the same time.

"And I beg of you to reconsider… please." I slashed Spirit at her, she dogged it. "Still stepping before you swing, I see." She toyed and tried to slash at me with the dagger. I then swung Spirit many times in a row and she dogged the attacks, carefully watching my feet and my movements. As she would swing the dagger I watched her face, trying to read her. But it was no use, she was always good at hiding her emoisons during a fight.

Then she some how disarmed me and threw me against the wall, she held me down with her forearm across my chest and dagger near my neck. With her other hand she placed it gently on my cheek.

"Zarina, please… I am your friend! We have been friends since we were children, we trained together, laughed together, and played as children. I love you like a sister, please remember who your true self is."

"No we were not!" I pushed her off of me, grabbing her hand that had the dagger in it. I grabbed the dagger from her hand and pushed her to the ground. I found a weak part in Asgard armour and thrust the dagger into it, it was a part of the armour in the lower center of the chest. I twisted my dagger and pulled it out. Blood pooled out of the wound and she started to cough and gasp for breath.

"Sif!" I looked up and saw Loki. He stopped in his tracks when he saw me. "Zarina?" I got up, dropped my dagger and switched it for Spirit.

"Hello," I smiled coldly. I walked up to him and placed my sword near his neck. He looked as though he did not even care I was about to kill him. He did not even seem to be surprised that I was still alive!

"Go a head, do it." he teased.

"Loki…" Sif moaned, I quickly looked behind me, she had turned her body over so she was on her frontside. She had one hand over the wound and trying to hold herself up with the other.

Loki looked over at Sif. "Sif, calm down and save your energy." He looked at me, "You, my dear, just go a head and do it! I bet you won't because I know you are still a weak little girl. Go ahead! Do it!" I felt anger and range flood in me, I raised my sword and started to bring it down to his neck.


	9. Mind

Suddenly he disappeared in a green mist, "How about here?" He was in front of me again, I slashed at him and he disappeared again. "Missed me again." I growled in frustration and continued slashing at the multiple Loki's that appeared. Each time they disappeared, I grew in frustration; I could hear Loki chuckle at my struggling. I turned and saw him starting to pick up Sif.

"You and Thor are always falling for that."

"Perhaps this time I'll be successful." I took out my dagger and threw it at him. He used his magic to stop it.

He looked down at Sif, "My dear Sif, you will be alright." Loki told Sif calmly.

"I cannot believe I am trusting you." She muttered in a weak tone.

"Let go of her, she is mine!" I growled.

"As for you, Zarina, why don't you shut up." He snapped his fingers and right away I felt something wrong. When I opened my mouth to protest, but nothing came out. "Do not worry, the spell will disappear when I say so." My lip curled up and I tried to make a low growl escaped my lips, but to no avail.

Suddenly we were surrounded by a few guards and Warriors Three. Each had a different look of confusion, shock, and relief on their face when they saw me. Loki turned to Fandral and handed Sif to him, Sif was now starting to get pale and shaking. Her blood was all over her, some on Loki's hands and some soaking his robes; a lot of her blood had pooled on the floor.

"Take her to the infirmary, quickly and be careful." Fandral nodded and carried her away, keeping his friend close to him. All the other guards looked over at me, "Restrain her." Right away Hogun, Volstagg, and a couple other guards were on top of me. I slashed at them, but I was disarmed immediately; sword and shield.

"What should we do with her?" One of the guards had the audacity to put my own dagger to my neck.

"I said restrain her! Not simply hold her down!" Seconds later a guard showed up with chains and shackles. My hands were shoved in front of me and thick metal shackles clasped around them, there were chains attached to that, the other ends were attached to the metal shackles that went around my ankles. There were more chains attached to the shackles around my wrists and on the other end was a large shackle that went around my neck. Finally they attached chains around my waist and more chains to that to hold me back. I tried to lunge at Loki, but they yanked the chains back and I fell back. I tried to cry out when I landed on my backside, but because my voice was gone, I couldn't.

"Good, now follow me." I could see the sadness and betrayal in his eyes before he turned around and started walking. Whatever I had coming was not good.

Meanwhile:

_Zarina, how can she be alive?_ Loki thought. New emotions filled him, he was happy she was alive, but devastated that she was trying to attack him. The hate and anger in her eyes was unreal. She was still trying to attack him, but being held back by the guards.

_Zarina, please stop. This is not like you… You were even willing to attack, and kill, your best friend._ A single tear ran down the side of his face, he quickly wiped it away. He could hear her breathing funny from trying to scream at him.

They walked to the throne room, he knew he must bring her to Odin… he just did not want to. He had no idea what he was going to do to her. They entered the throne room, Odin was on his throne, Frigga to his left and Thor to his right. He walked up there, not making eye contact with anyone, his only thoughts were on Zarina. Once to base of the steps he walked up them and stood next to Frigga. She wrapped an arm around him right away as the guards forced Zarina to her knees.

"Zarina?" Thor questioned, Loki looked over to him. He was looking over at Odin and Frigga, a look of shock and confusion on his face. "I thought she was dead."

"Apparently she is not." Loki said, he looked down at Zarina who was doing her best to get to her feet. Her teeth were bared and her breathing heavy, she looked like a savage beast. She locked eyes with Loki, her eyes still hateful and out for blood.

"Zarina!" After a few seconds she turned her hateful gaze to Odin. "What is with this behavior? Why are you attacking the people of Asgard, you love the people Asgard." Zarina looked over at Loki.

"Oh, wait, I took her voice." He snapped his fingers and Zarina had her voice again.

"I will kill you for that." A thirsty smile slowly crossed her face and she turned back to Odin. "I was attacking Asgard because it was my orders! I do not love the people of Asgard, I came over here to rule over them!" She screamed, then gasped when she realized she had said too much.

"Thank you for that information. Take her to the dungeons, she will be executed tomorrow." Odin leaned back.

"What?" Loki and Thor yelled at the same time.

"Guards stay," Frigga command.

"No, go." The guards looked between Odin and Frigga before they stopped and just stood there. Fearing Frigga more than Odin.

Loki snapped his fingers again and took Zarina's voice again. "You can not have her executed, she did not do anything!" Loki yelled at Odin.

"For once I agree with Loki, surely there is some explanation as to why she is acting like this." Thor said walking in front of his father.

"Odin, this is due to magic and potions. If I can get a good look in her eyes, I will be able to see." Frigga started walking down to Zarina.

"No!" Odin commanded, a couple guards stood in her way as to protect her, but she simply looked at them and they backed off. The guards quickly wrapped the chain around Zarina, pinning her arms to her chest.

Frigga kneeled in front of her, she placed her hands on Zarina's face, her thumbs on her temples, and held her head still. She took a long look at Zarina's eyes, then muttered a few words under her breath. Zarina jolted in pain, trying to cry out, but after the pain went away, she looked at Frigga differently. She cocked her head just slightly and blinked rapidly as if she was trying to remember her.

"For now put her in a cell, put a fainting couch and a couple hides in there. Also give her a dress, allow her to change out of her armour. She will not be executed." The guards picked her up and started to walk away with her. "Loki give her, her voice back." He snapped and Zarina had her voice back, but did not say anything.

Once Zarina was gone Odin spoke, "She's unstable, she attacked Lady Sif and tried to attack Loki."

Frigga walked back up the steps to the thrones and took her original spot, she turned to Odin. "These actions are not her own! She's under powerful spells and potions, Taegen took her old self and tucked it away in her mind and replaced her with what we saw."

"Is there any to reverse it?" Loki quickly asked.

She turned to Loki, "Yes, that spell I did was to see if she would remember me. With something more powerful it might be possible. But Taegen is no fool, he'll have put spells on her to prevent his being changed."

"But did your spell work?"

"Yes, there was something different about the way she looked at me." A glimmer of hope flashed in Loki's eyes and he nodded. Frigga took his hands in hers, in a very low voice he said, "If we combine our magic we will have a shot at helping her." Loki gave a slight nod.

Odin stood up. "No, I will not allow you near her. She is wild, dangerous, and unpredictable."

"Perhaps if I held her down or a healer can put her in a temporary sleep." Thor suggested.

"No, she has to be awake… holding her down is not a bad idea." Frigga sighed before finishing. "I do not like the sound of holding her down, but it will be for her own good." Frigga looked down, she remembered the last time they had to have Zarina held down. Zarina was just a little girl and had gotten hurt; Frigga couldn't even watch as the healers held her down to help her.

"My word still stands, she will be executed tomorrow." Odin made clear.

Frigga looked back up at Odin, "You will not be taking my daughter away from me, or you will regret it." Her eyes were full of anger and with that she walked out, Loki following close behind her. Thor looked between Odin and the pair walking out for a moment, then followed them. For he himself could not even comprehend his father's words.

Normal POV

I was lying on the fainting couch, my face away from where people could see me. The hides they given me were wrapped tightly around me. The guards gave me some simple blue robes, they took away my amour when I was done changing and left. I did not even move when I heard people walk into my cell, instead I tensed up and prepared for the worse.

I was grabbed and pulled to my feet, my arms were held behind me by strong arms. Just from his musky smell, and the strength of the arms, I could tell it was Thor. In front of me was Loki and Frigga. With Loki and Thor I felt undying hatred, but with Frigga I felt… love. While Thor was behind me, holding me back, Loki stayed at the far corner of the cell; as if something would happen to him if he got to close.

Frigga walked up to me and put her hand on my cheek. "How are you feeling, sweetheart?" I looked up at her, this woman has been practically my mother ever since my real one abandoned me.

"I am sorry, Mother, I really am." Tears started to fill my eyes and fall out immediately. Her eyes flicked to Thor and he let me go; I wrapped my arms around her waist and buried my face in her shoulder. She wrapped her arms tightly around me and held me close.

"It is ok, dear." She said softly in my ear and ran her fingers through the tangled ends of my hair. "It will all be ok, trust me." Her voice was soft and gentle, and had a calming effect on me.

Volstagg walked up and stood outside the cell. "My lady, when she was changing out of her armour, I noticed some rather disturbing markings on her backside… Just thought you ought to know." He looked down, before looking back up, noding, and leaving. I froze up when he mentioned the bruises.

Frigga looked at me, with great worry in her eyes. "Zarina, what makings is he talking about?" I bit my lower lip.

"Nothing… just nothing."

She turned to her sons, "Boys out." They looked at each other for a moment, then me, then their mother, and finally left. The moment they left Frigga used her magic to make the walls dark, so dark you couldn't see through them, but there still was light in the cell. Frigga put her hands on my cheeks; I wanted to do nothing more than go hide in very small room and cry.

"Please, you have to show me." I pulled away from her and with shaking hands, I pulled off my dress robe; I turned around and pulled the dress up past my buttocks. I heard Frigga gasp, last I checked, the bruises were all black and purple looking. "D-Did Taegen do this to you?"

I fixed my dress and turned around. "Yes."

"Why?"

I looked down, "Because I deserved it."

She grasped my shoulders. "You did nothing wrong, whatever he did to you was wrong."

"No I was wrong, I lied to him many times, struck and killed a guard higher than myself, and he punished me for almost allowing myself to be raped." I stopped talking.

"I am sorry, honey, but none of those things were your fault and you did not deserve to be punished for that." She looked away, "I am sorry, but I have to go."

"No, Mother, please… I can not be alone anymore." A few tears fell down my face, she put her hand on my cheek.

"Do not fret, dear, I will be back. Trust me." She used her thumb to wipe the tears from my face before pulling me in for a hug. After that, she left and I was all alone again. She dropped the spell so I could see the outside of the cell. Loki took a good long look at me, I curled my lips and bared my teeth at him; he shook his head and walked away.

I curled up on the fainting couch and eventually fell asleep.

Hours later I felt someone touch my shoulder. Looking up, I saw it was Frigga. "I told you I would be back."

I smiled and sat up, blinking rapidly my eyes adjusted to the bright light. I saw two others in my cell as well, Thor and Loki. Outside the cell I could see many guards and Odin standing there watching me as if I were the town fool. "What are they doing here?" I snarled and nodded at Thor and Loki.

"Zarina, behave yourself!"

I lowered my head, "Yes ma'am."

"Now Zarina stand up and Loki stand in front of her, and Thor stand behind her." I stood up and watched the god walk in front of me and the other walk behind me. I could tell he was feeling a realm of hurt, his eyes showed sadness and desperation; the other kept a neutral expression.

"Loki put your hands on the side of her face with your thumbs on her temples." Loki was hesitant at first, but then put his hands where Frigga told him too. I felt my whole body thence up once he touched me. "Zarina, do the same." I followed her orders, I slightly put pressure on his skull when I placed my hands on the sides of his face. He did the same, I think Frigga noticed, but didn't do anything.

Frigga put her one hand on the back of Loki's head and the other on the back of mine. When she put her head down and started to mutter something, I felt hands grip my waist; I knew it was Thor, ready to pull me back in a moments notice.

I was watching Loki closely, he was muttering something along with Frigga. I couldn't make out what they were saying, but they were insync. I watched a green mist-like stuff creep over my arms and wrap around my body, mostly around my upper torso. Then I felt pain grip my body, I jumped and sank my teeth into my lower lip to keep myself from crying out; I curled my my fingers and tighten my hands on Loki. The pain was so great, it was almost as bad as the pain Taegen put me through before I swoar oath to him.

Then it all stopped, but small twinges of pain pinched my body, and all hands that were on me were off. I still kept my hands on Loki, but they slid down to grip his shoulders. I finally opened my eyes when the pain had lessened more and I could focus on something other than that. I noticed my fingers curled into Loki's shoulders, his jaw was clenched tightly as if to mask the pain, I only curled my fingers tighter.

"I do not think it worked." Loki commented.

"What makes you think that?" Frigga asked.

"Because she's digging her fingers into my shoulder." I un-gripped his shoulders and went for his throat. Thor quickly wrapped his arm around me, somehow pinning my arms under his.

Then Odin spoke up. "I am sorry, my dear, but I knew the spell would not work as I told you three all along. She will be executed, guards grab her." A pair of guards started to walk into the cell.

"No!" Loki screamed and grabbed me, putting his lips to mine. I tried to push him away and resist his kiss, but he kept going. He pushed his tongue into my mouth and pressed it against mine. I went to bit him… but something happened… something good clicked. I pulled away and looked at him for a good, long, time.

Memories, good and bad, flooded into my mind. The memory of the celebration after I got back from training and swoar oath to Asgard; how he doted on me and danced with me… laughed at me when he learned I could not dance that well. The look of sheer happiness when I confided him in private and told him I had truly accepted the betrothal; not because I was forced to, but because I actually loved him. Even when he replaced my golden hair for black dwarf hair, filled my mind.

"I am so sorry," tears filled my eyes and I wrapped my arms around him. He wrapped his around me and he held me as close as possible. It was a good thing I was a warrior or else my knees would not have been able to support me.

Frigga turned to Odin, "What was that about the spell not working? And what was that about executing my daughter?" She remained composed like a queen should, but her voice had a vile edge to it.

"Nothing, dear, guards stand down." The guards exited the cell, but stood outside of it. I pulled back and looked Loki in the eyes, he used his thumb to wipe away the tears from my face. He leaned down and placed his lips on my forehead.

I pulled from his grip further and turned to Thor. "I am sorry, I know that does not mean a whole lot right now." He pulled me into his arms.

"Not to worry, glad you have you back, Zarina." I then turned to Frigga, who right away took me into her arms.

"Do not even think of apologizing, you did nothing wrong." She pulled back and kissed me on the cheek. I turned to Odin, but just stood there picking at my dress.

"It is nice to have you back, Zarina." His voice was unreadable, there was no emotion to his words. He did not seem happy nor upset about me being here and having my mind as my own. It was almost as if he just said something to say something, almost as if Frigga would be on his case if he did not say something kind to me.

"I want to hear a full report of when you were over in Vanaheim and Taegen." Odin commanded, I opened my mouth to say something, but Frigga spoke up.

"Loki, take her to the healers, first, I want to be sure she will be alright. The spell won't be kind for the next couple days." Frigga put her hand on my shoulder. Loki grabbed my hand and lead me out of the cell and down the hall. Thor came up to my other side and wrapped an arm around my shoulders.

I then heard a new voice in my mind. _"Did you really think you would get off that easily, Zarina?"_ And new pain flashed in my body.


	10. Reality

I fell to my knees, clutching my the sides of my head. Right away Loki was at my side and had his arm wrapped around me; I sank my teeth into my lower lip trying to keep from screaming.

_"Pathetic little bitch, I am the one who owns you and I control you."_ It was Taegen's voice in my head, he was the one causing me pain. "_So enjoy the pain, it's your punishment for letting them get to you." _The pain shot through my body again and I finally cried out.

"Zarina, what's wrong?" Thor asked when he dropped to my side and wrapped an arm around me too. Then Frigga knelt down in front of me and grasped both sides of my head. She looked deep into my pain filled eyes, I could tell her eyes were searching for answers.

"I -I do -don't know." I whimpered.

"There must be some sort of link between her and Taegen... Just get her to the infirmary, the healers will know what to do." Frigga said as Loki and Thor helped me up, I turned into Loki's grasp. The pain of everything was too much to handle and I just wanted to die.

"Wait." Odin's booming voice came from behind. He walked in front of me and I immediately cowered into Loki's chest. (After all, moments ago he wanted me executed.) He grasped my left hand and took off the rings; he threw them on the ground and used his staff to crush them.

I heard them both break and just like that, I was free of any pain. Though some still lingered. I gasped when that happened and I felt free of Taegen's magic. It was like I was in a fog of pain and never ending suffering, then just like that the fog was gone. Perhaps the gods cared about me after all.

"Now take her to the healers." Just like that we were gone, Loki had lifted me into his strong arms and was half running to get me there as fast as he could. I just buried my face into his chest and shook with lingering pain.

"You'll be ok, Zarina. Shh, shh, shhh." Loki's words seemed to sooth me and I soon passed out.

When I woke, I was laying in a bed with a couple of hides over my body. I tried to turn over, but groaned when I tried to move. Pain shot through my body, but it wasn't the kind that Taegen had been inflicting on me. It was a new pain, something that felt more natural. Something that wasn't conjured through spells and magic.

"Loki?" I sat up, but more of the pain shot through me and I sank into the bed. I clenched my lower abdomen and tried not to cry out.

"Where you married to that man?" I looked up, Loki was walking into the chamber. He stopped just a few feet before the bed. His eyes looked sad and he looked as though he was holding back tears, he couldn't even make eye contact.

I hung my head down in shame. "Yes I was, he...we slept together." I wanted to cry and go hide in a dark room. None of this was suppose to happen; so why did it? Why did I happen to me? "I-I-I am sorry. I understand why you wouldn't forgive me." He was by my side in a second with his arms wrapped around me.

"I just wanted to know, Mother and I have been investigating the magic in the rings. I forgive you, Zarina. Those actions were not your own... You were under the influence of power magic and spells and positions. Do you even remember it?"

"I mostly remember the emotions I was feeling...sometimes the actions, but... I feel as though some of the things I was doing were my own actions. I was aware of what I was doing and yet I couldn't stop it. I know it must sound mad."

"It's fine, Zarina. I have to ask, where you with a child?" I froze and ran my hands over my belly.

"Yes. Why? What is wrong?"

"After you passed out and I got you here, a healer noticed you bleeding heavily from down there. After healing spells didn't work, they tried some other methods and found that it died. Their guess was your body couldn't handle that and the pain you were in." I started to shake and felt tears roll down my face. He pulled me close to him and I buried my face in his chest.

"I didn't even want the child in the first place, so why am I feeling this way?" I asked.

"Because it was a child none less. If you had given birth to it, would you have hated it?" I pulled back to look up at him.

"What? No, I would have loved it like a true mother should. What on Midgard would compel you to ask that?"

"I was simply wondering, dear."

A sudden, horrible, thought struck me. "L-Loki, if we are still betrothed...then you cannot wed me. I am impure."

"So? I am too."

"But you are a man, that is expected."

"Purity it nothing more than a social conduct, I do not care that you're impure because I simply don't care. You're still the same Zarina I know and love." I smiled and wiped the tears from my face. "Well I think you're more graceful, cunning, and muscular. I mean look at your arms." He poked my arms playfully.

"And how does that make you feel? A maiden being stronger than a god." I laughed.

"I am but one god you're stronger than."

"So you admit I am stronger than you?"

"I will neither confirm nor deny that." He chuckled and wrapped his arms around me, he pulled me close. "I love you."

With my face buried in his chest, I tried to reply: "I love you too." But it was muffled from my face being buried in his chest.

"I am glad to see you two getting along." I looked up and saw Frigga walking toward us. "How are you feeling."

"A little nauseated, but for the most part okay." She put her hand on my cheek and I leaned in to her touch.

"You will be fine, child, you are not feverish." She ran her fingers through my hair just as she did when I was a child and leaned forward to kiss me on the forehead. I smiled and wrapped my arms around her, snuggling in her warm touch. "I am so glad you are back, I missed you so much."

"So what do I do now that I've lost the child?" I asked, looking up at her.

She put her hands back on my cheeks, "I do not know, for I have never had to face what you are facing; but you will just fine. Trust me, child, I know you well." She then gave me a final kiss on my forehead and left.

I suddenly remembered something and looked over at Loki. "How is Sif?"

"Lady Sif is fine, a little hurt, but she'll pull through. You of all people should know that."

"I-I-I know, but I feel so bad for hurting her...I-I almost killed her. I would not have been able to live with that." Hot tears ran down the sides of my face.

He cupped the sides of my face, "Do not worry and do not say that, do you wish to see her?"

"Yes!" I said eagerly and jump up, but a sudden rush of nausea hit me and I double over, clenching my belly. Loki jumped up and wrapped his arms around me as if to support me, but it didn't help and the pressure from his arms being wrapped around my torso makes my stomach empty itself. I dropped to my knees, my own vomit getting all over the front of my dress.

"Let me go please, that's not helping." I coughed and let go of me. Loki started to call for some healers and they came rushing in.

"My lady, here." One of the healers put a bucket under my face just as I threw up again. She held my hair back and ran her hand over my back. Another would give me a water skin in between to help get the taste out of my mouth, but she didn't let me swallow the water, I had to spit it out.

"I could have done that!" Loki yelled at the healers.

"My lord, there is nothing we can do. She lost a child, this it just going to have to pass." One of them told Loki, the other held a bucket under my face and held my hair back. I vomited again, this time into the wooden bucket.

"Loki, why don't you step out for a minute or two." I looked up and shot him a glare, after a moment of silence he nodded and walked out of the room. The healer helped me to my feet and sat me on the bed; she grabbed a cloth and wiped my face off. Another one walked into the chambers with a dress in her hands; they carefully got me out of my other one and I put on the one they gave me.

It was a long, emerald green dress that went swooped all around my ankles. It was a round collar, sleeveless type dress with a black belt around my waist. I stepped into a pair of emerald green flats that strapped around my ankles. I stood up slowly and stood for a minute to make sure I wasn't going to throw up again and get dizzy. One of the healers put her hand on my shoulder to steady me, I wasn't feeling ill, but they knew more than I did when it came to medicine. Thankfully while I was getting re-dressed they didn't say anything about the marks on my backside, they still hurt a little when I moved in a certain way or sat down.

"Are you feeling alright, my lady?"

I nodded, "Yes, am I all clear to leave?"

She smiled, "Of course my lady, come back if you feel unwell at any point."

"Thank you," I looked down. "Sorry about the mess."

"Nonsense it is fine." She then dismissed me and I walked out, Loki was waiting impatiently for me.

He looked me up and down and smiled, "You look _marvelous_."

"Loki, close your mouth." I tapped the underside of his chin, he grabbed me by my waist and pulled me close. "Loki, what are you doing?"

His lips go closer to mine, "Shh, quiet love." He put his lips on mine, his lips were cold in comparison to my warm ones. His lips over powered mine and his tongue entered my mouth, I gave in to him not feeling like fighting with him. I wrapped my arms around his waist and laced my fingers together, he ravished my mouth with his tongue and I moaned into his touch.

He pulled away, " I love you."

I smiled, "I love you too. Can I go see my friend now?"

He chuckled, "Yes." We walked down the golden hallways with quick haste; when we entered the chambers she was in, she was laying in the bed with her arms crossed over her chest. She had obviously wanted to get out of here, but the healers wouldn't let her. She never liked being in the healers for long periods of time. Her face lit up when she saw me, she had most of her amour removed and a thick cotton wrapped around her torso. She kept her blanket wrapped around her body as much as possible.

"Zarina!" I was half hiding behind Loki because I felt so guilty for what I did to her. Loki pushed me in front of him and forced me to walk forward. I sat at the edge of the bed and kept my head down. Sif grabbed my chin and forced me to look her in the eyes.

"Listen closely, none of this is your fault. None of it, got it?" She wasn't angry with me, but she sure was firm. She could sometimes be a little on the scary side when she was firm, even scarier when she was angry.

I smiled, "Understood." She smiled back and pulled me in for a hug, flinching just a little when she did because of her wound.

She pulled back, "Besides the attack was sloppy, I can still determine your every move. When you stabbed me, you did not hit any vital organs... it is almost like you wanted me to live." She laughed, I laughed too.

"When you are well enough, I shall meet you on the training field." I smirked in a very challenging way.

She smirked back, "You lose then you have to muck out my horses stable for a week."

"And you lose then you have to wear the girlest dress I can find with accessories to the next celebration." I smiled and she pinched her face up in disgust.

"Deal," she held out her hand and we shook on it. "That's the Zrin I know and love." She smiled and pulled me into a hug again. I didn't even realize she used my nickname she gave me a long time ago.

Loki laughed, I had forgotten he was even there. I pulled back and looked over at him, "What?" I said jokingly.

"'Zrin'?" He chuckled.

"No, only Sif can call me that."

"And what if I call you by your little nickname?"

"I will kill you in your sleep." Sif and I laughed at that, after a second Loki laughed as well.

After Sif and I basically reunited, we all went down to the diner feast later in the night. I helped Sif, despite her refusal, down there a little. She was, and felt, fine and wanted to join us for supper. Apparently there was a large feast for my safe return, also I was able to give vital information about the Vanahheim. Also someone was going to ask me something important, so I assume the feast is a cover for that.

After supper was over, and we were waiting for desert, Loki leaned over and kissed my cheek. "As long as the stars still shine, I will always love you."

"And if the stars stop shining?" Everyone got silent, it was strange.

"Then I would still love you, just as the moon needs the stars and the sun needs the sky; I need you."

I smiled, "Cute metaphor, didn't know you had it in you." I chuckled, everyone around us did too. "And I need you."

Loki smiled and pulled out a ring, I gasped. "Marry me?" I felt extremely happy, but a bundle of nerves built up deep in my belly.

"Yes," he slid the ring on my finger and everyone started to cheer and clap. It was a beautiful silver ring with a emerald diamond in the middle and two white diamonds on the sides. Loki leaned in and kissed me deeply on my lips.


End file.
